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Monday, September 9, 2002

Drew's family has two new dogs. Drew's daughter has lost interest in the tree house; now she wants Adam to build a dog house:

Adam: So, Drew got himself a couple of dogs. What's the names again?

Drew: Lulu and Daisy... good times.

Adam: Lulu and Daisy...

[Anderson plays the You're Gay drop three times in a row.]

Adam: ...and who named them? Paulina?

Drew: Of course. She's gotten now off the tree house thing now.

Adam: Thank goodness.

Drew: So you've been relieved of that. Now you have to build a dog house. [Laughs.]

Adam: Oh, I can build a dog house. I've built dog houses.

Wednesday, September 11, 2002

Tonight's commercial-free show focused on last year's terrorist attacks.

Thursday, September 12, 2002

Stryker fills-in for Adam once again. Adam is in Tahoe for his bachelor party:

Stryker: All right! What's up, you guys? We're back with "Loveline." And I'm Stryker for Adam Carolla, he's coming back on Sunday. He is literally a millionaire, so he's off doing something else now, probably, pretty exciting.

Drew: He's at his bachelor party.

Stryker: His own bachelor party?

Drew: Mmmm-hmmm.

Stryker: You're kidding!

Guest Janeane Garofalo: I thought he was already married.

Drew: Nope. It's coming up.

Stryker: Is that in Vegas? Is he doing it in Vegas?

Drew: No, in Tahoe.

Stryker: Oh! Wow.

Drew: And I'm gonna eat s--- for not being there.

Janeane: Isn't that show just like a bachelor party? So he has a bachelor party all the time.

Drew: Yes, so he takes that group of guys...

Stryker: ...and the trampolines.

Janeane: Uh-huh, and they just do the same thing, without cameras running.

Drew: Without cameras running.

Janeane: I see.

Stryker: Did he bring the girls from the trampolines?

Drew: I don't know.

Stryker: Oh, man.

Sunday, September 15, 2002

Adam reveals that he competed in a Golden Gloves tournament at the Olympic Auditorium in 1985. He also confirms that he is the voice in the new Burger King commercials:

Adam: It's a long story. Anything I describe sounds bad. So, you'll see one of these commercials somewhere in the next few weeks.

Bruce: So you're gonna to sue Vegas regarding their poor health habits, and then you're promoting fast food. That's fine.

Adam: Burger King. That's right. That's right. Listen, I have no qualms about a nice payday for the use of my voice.

Bruce: Obviously.

Adam: That's why I got into this business. This is why I did it.

Thursday, September 19, 2002

Drew's kids will be playing in a football game in the Rose Bowl this weekend:

Drew: Oh! My kids are playing in the Rose Bowl this weekend. Did I tell you this?

Adam: Oh, listen. I've had enough of those kids, Drew.

Drew: Did I tell you this?

Adam: I've gotta be honest with you. Those kids are living too good a life.

Drew: You've gotta come visit. You've gotta come watch this game.

Adam: What are they playing...? If you tell me they're playing a Pop Warner football game in the Rose Bowl, I'll jump right through that window.

Drew: I beg your pardon, but that's what you're going to have to do!

Adam: Oh, my god! These kids! When they're not ice skating in the South of France, they're playing in the Rose Bowl!

Drew: They won a contest, so they're playing their first game in the Rose Bowl.

Adam: Oh!

Drew: I'm announcing in the announcing both! Come on and do it with me!

Adam: Oh! I'm wanna kill 'em. I'm so jealous. So jealous!

Sunday, September 22, 2002

Adam introduces his three aphorisms for life: "That's why I/you get the big bucks," "He's a big boy," and "What are you gonna do?" [These three phrases, together with "Good times," eventually led to "Cyber Adam."]

Thursday, September 26, 2002

Adam is getting married on Saturday.

Tuesday, September 30, 2002

Janeane Garofalo's conflict with Engineer Anderson earlier in the month is discussed:

[Anderson plays a Janeane Garofalo drop during the bumper as they are coming back from a commercial: "Hi, this is Janeane Garofalo, and if you've ever wondered if there's people that are way worse off than you, listen to 'Loveline.'"]

Adam: Hey, yo. "Loveline."

Drew: She got a little weird on Anderson, old Janeane.

Adam: Janeane did?

Drew: Yeah.

Guest Kathy Griffin: On what?

Drew: On Anderson.

Adam: What was her beef? Janeane's with... I was not here the night Janeane Garofalo was here, but...

Drew: What was the drop you put in, I forget.

Kathy: She thought...

[Anderson plays the Snoop Dog "Bitch" drop.]

Drew: That. That drop.

Adam: And why...

Drew: And she took great offense to that.

Kathy: Oh, all right.

[Anderson plays the "How gay are you?" drop.]

Adam: Why did she take offense to that?

Drew: Anderson?

Anderson: 'Cause she's crazy.

Adam: All right.

Kathy: [Laughs.] Yeah, all chicks are, dude. Wooo!

Anderson: I think it's 'cause you weren't here, and she needed somebody to be mad at.

Adam: Oh.

Anderson: And I was the next best thing.

Adam: Oh. Yeah. I dunno if she likes the fellas, that Janeane.

Kathy: Well, she sounded very sexy in that bumper. "This is Janeane Garofalo." I wanted to screw her.

Adam: Are you friends? You should be friends with her.

Kathy: Yeah. I do know her.

Adam: All right.

Anderson: She got real pissed when I played this. [Plays the "You're a lesbian" Drew drop.] See, that's what really set her off.

Drew: That's what got her going.

Kathy: What?! She does that whole thing in her HBO hour about how a lot of people think she's gay, 'cause she's very masculine.

Anderson: Set her off.

Kathy: All right.

Drew: It got her going, yeah.

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