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plurry |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 5:43 PM more like a cigar. —plurry |
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chix0r |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 5:47 PM I usually watch my boyfriend pee because, yay penis, but he always wants me to hold it and the one time I tried I failed, so ever since then I've refused. The idea of anyone holding their penis full-handed to pee makes me think this was a trick question, however. —chix0r |
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plurry |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 5:49 PM what resulted in the "failure". pee everywhere, i assume? —plurry |
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chix0r |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 5:52 PM Not "everywhere," I just didn't have as much control as I would've liked. Some on the seat, I think. It's hard to do from behind someone, and to get the pressure right never having done it before. —chix0r |
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TortillaFactory |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 5:53 PM The idea of anyone holding their penis full-handed to pee makes me think this was a trick question, however. what about those guys with massive flaccid penii; how can they control it with just two fingers? WON'T SOMEONE PLEASE THINK OF THE CHILDREN and by the children I mean John Holmes. —TortillaFactory |
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jezebel |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 6:19 PM I'm starting to hate it when chix0r posts because it's almost always something that sicks me out. —jezebel |
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adams_babymomma |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 6:30 PM
Edited Monday, March 10, 2008 at 6:30 PM Those with a peen:
How about squirting others while they're sleeping?
—adams_babymomma |
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anobody |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 7:17 PM I need a hydraulic jack to lift mine. —anobody |
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Dusty TheHick |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 7:20 PM Well, first I unwrap it from my waist.... ...but seriously...
Sort of make a circle with the thumb and forefinger, around the peen, while using the other three fingers to hold the ball bag out of the way, and the heel of the hand to hold back any nearby boxer-short material.
—Dusty TheHick |
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TortillaFactory |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 7:23 PM hold the ball bag out of the way would you piss on your balls if you didn't do this, or what? I didn't think that the sack usually got anywhere near the urine stream —TortillaFactory |
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Dusty TheHick |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 7:25 PM
Edited Monday, March 10, 2008 at 7:28 PM It doesn't really, but it's not held back and up, it just kinda makes things awkward. I can't really explain it. Besides...if those fingers aren't UNDER it, they'll be pressed INTO it. That would kinda suck.
EDIT: I suppose it's entirely possible, though, that most other dudes don't do this. I don't exactly go around studying others' techniques.
—Dusty TheHick |
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ZT Spice |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 7:35 PM I hold it more like a magic marker. —ZT Spice |
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lexieho |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 7:50 PM ilu tlc. ps. whois. i asked derek once if he used a poster tube. also i too failed trying to 'pee' a boy once : ( [just some random boy] —lexieho |
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miyagi-sama |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 7:52 PM There's GOT to be porn centered around guys peeing while chicks hold their junk. At least I hope there is. —miyagi-sama |
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abusive a-hole |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 8:00 PM yeah and the tampon thread is just dinnertime conversation I'm not going in there. Delicate sensibilities. —abusive a-hole |
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adams_babymomma |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 8:02 PM I hold it like a garden hose I guess.
I was going to ask that, but I thought it would be silly.
—adams_babymomma |
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mandee |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 8:08 PM has anyone ever peed on an electric fence? —mandee |
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Dusty TheHick |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 8:15 PM When I was little
And had no sense
I took a whiz
On a 'lectric fence
It hurt so bad
It shocked my balls
Then I took a crap
In my overalls —Dusty TheHick |
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lexieho |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 8:22 PM tlc poetry.
roses are red
violets are blue
i want to fuck you with a rake
—lexieho |
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lexieho |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 8:24 PM i know i did.
who's bash?
—lexieho |
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foob2011 |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 9:19 PM Ill pee on you if you want abm. I usually tuck it in between my legs and sit down because MAN I FEEL LIKE A WOMAN. —foob2011 |
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acm323 |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 10:12 PM One time my ex said: "Hey, look at this!" I turned around and saw that he had tucked his junk between his legs and it looked like he had a snatch. I gagged and told him never to do that again. Tucking is just...gross! —acm323 |
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000 |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 10:25 PM when i m very tired and lazy i sit to pee —000 |
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jizzgrenade |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 10:58 PM honestly i always sit, unless theres a urinal of coarse; if ur uncut pissing can be messy, i dont hold it down either way, aside from wrapping it around my waist first so it doesn't dunk in the water, obviously —jizzgrenade |
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airking32 |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 11:02 PM
Edited Monday, March 10, 2008 at 11:03 PM i can't resist a loveline answer here. THOSE WITH A PEEN: HOW DO YOU URINATE i urinate pretty good UGH I ASKED YOU HOW DO YOU URINATE how do I ? EDIT: i just read jizz's post and that is FUCKING WEIRD. —airking32 |
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TortillaFactory |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 11:03 PM LOVELINE REENACTMENT THOSE WITH A PEEN: HOW DO YOU URINATE i urinate pretty good UGH I ASKED YOU HOW DO YOU URINATE how do I ? —airking32 —TortillaFactory |
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bguirk |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 11:11 PM 1st piss of the morning is usually sitting down because wife/dog/cat woke me up to get me to take to breakfast/walk/feed and I'm still 80% asleep and incapable of aiming. Then there's the whole 80 cubic feet of gas I need to expel. This morning's gas cloud should've reached Syracuse by now TF--given the prevailing winds and all. —bguirk |
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airking32 |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 11:14 PM are you guys serious? i have never sat down for only #1 in my LIFE. —airking32 |
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bguirk |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 11:19 PM I'm pretty sure you pissed yourself a number of times whilst sitting during your childhood. 1st one of the day on my ass. The other 5 go in the sink so no one thinks I'm gay. —bguirk |
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airking32 |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 11:21 PM mmm... i guess i meant my adult life. well, let's say starting at age 7. i'm just saying it never would even occur to me to sit down to piss, even at my most tired and/or disoriented. —airking32 |
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bguirk |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 11:37 PM it takes different strokes to rule the world. —bguirk |
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plurry |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 11:46 PM
Edited Monday, March 10, 2008 at 11:49 PM i've never pissed sitting down. edit: discounting the times i've sat down intending to crap but came up snake eyes. —plurry |
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bguirk |
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Monday, March 10, 2008 at 11:52 PM lot of hostility towards men who sit. I'm proud. I say stand up for sitting down. —bguirk |
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TortillaFactory |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 12:03 AM I think it's pretty normal, just not amongst those who are insecure in their sexuality —TortillaFactory |
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bguirk |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 12:14 AM quick facts--apparently 40% of Japanese pee sitting down all the time. Larry David sits down to piss and I think he did an episode of Curb about it. When I build my mansion I will have a troff like they used to at the ballparks/arenaas of my youth so I can take a nice safe communal piss w/ my brothers (no crossing swords). The troff will be for vomit and/or piss. Do not shit in my troff mother fuckers. —bguirk |
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airking32 |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 12:17 AM not amongst those who are insecure in their sexuality what do your urinating habits have to do with your sexual proclivity? —airking32 |
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derekho |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 12:29 AM I don't like sitting down if I really have to go because it can cause some splashing action to occur. I don't have anything against sitting down in general though. Jizzguzzler- what sort of disturbing foreskin do you have that cannot be easily moved out of the way when urinating? Don't post pics. If your hand is down there aiming you might as well get your schmeeze out of the way first. —derekho |
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derekho |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 12:33 AM quick facts--apparently 40% of Japanese pee sitting down all the time. Read this originally as 40% of ALL Japanese, not just men. —derekho |
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MajandraFan |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 1:54 AM Sitting down is too much effort. When I was younger I couldn't even be bothered lifting the seat up, so I'd always get piss on it.
I never hold it unless I have an uncontrollable bone and just can't wait to flaccify. This habit has been reinforced by so often pissing in unconventional places. Anywhere in the backyard, frontyard, at the end of the street, in the middle of the street, in a sink, off the deck (when I was 13 i couldn't even be bothered with that so I'd just open the door and piss out of the house straight onto the deck); if I ever have to aim I usually angle my body, lean over the toilet, rather than aim by holding my dick.
I don't hold it when I jack off either, I practise and practice tantric masturbation. —MajandraFan |
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Jaffa Cakes |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 2:02 AM I sit down during the middle of the "night", barely awake urination. Also, a cigar, but I think TF already knew that. —Jaffa Cakes |
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TortillaFactory |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 2:04 AM I sit down during the middle of the "night", barely awake urination. this is like the beginning of a beautiful free-form poem go on —TortillaFactory |
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foob2011 |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 4:42 AM
Edited Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 4:42 AM schmeeze
—derekho
schmeeze
—derekho
schmeeze
—derekho
schmeeze
—derekho
schmeeze
—derekho
schmeeze
—derekho
schmeeze
—derekho
—foob2011 |
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shakrat |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 9:02 AM How about the shower? Let's hear some love for those who pee in the shower. Unless that's weird. Then I condemn us all. I mean you all. —shakrat |
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Beat It! |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 9:05 AM
Edited Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 9:05 AM I say stand up for sitting down. — bguirk Hell yeah. I sit down for any bathroom use from bedtime through the first pee of the morning - partly because I'm tired, mostly because I don't want to turn any lights on. Though I will do an occasional during the day sit down if I just don't feel like standing. The rest of the time I use a thumb on top, two fingers below method of aiming (I guess that would be the 'garden hose' method someone mentioned.) EDIT: If I'm in the shower and I need to pee, of course I'm gonna pee in the shower. —Beat It! |
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bguirk |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 9:16 AM How about the shower? Let's hear some love for those who pee in the shower. I tend to only pee in other people's shower because it's where I'm least likely to be in my evacuate then clean my naughty bits rhythm. Anyone have a couch I can flop on/shower I can pee in while I drive cross country in a few week? Beat It brings up a good point--I hate turning on the lights for the middle of the night piss and will often sit for those. Exception to morning sit downs--if I've lifted weights the day before and my legs are super sore I'll avoid sitting down because standing up is so hard. —bguirk |
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miyagi-sama |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 9:18 AM I pee outside whenever possible. It's extremely liberating. Plus it saves water. —miyagi-sama |
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Beat It! |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 9:41 AM When I bought my first house, I would always get a strong urge to pee in my yard. There was some sort of primal territory-marking drive at work here that I had never felt before. Not that I haven't peed outside hundreds of times, but I've never had a drive other than just because I had to go. Anyone else had that experience? —Beat It! |
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pookie |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 9:46 AM "I pee outside whenever possible. It's extremely liberating. Plus it saves water." — miyagi-sama This is why I avoid walking barefoot outside. —pookie |
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whoisnumbaone |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 11:16 AM i'm just saying it never would even occur to me to sit down to piss, even at my most tired and/or disoriented. —airking32 TOUCHE i've sat down intending to crap but came up snake eyes. —plurry hahaha, CRAPS refference
When I bought my first house, I would always get a strong urge to pee in my yard. There was some sort of primal territory-marking drive at work here that I had never felt before. Not that I haven't peed outside hundreds of times, but I've never had a drive other than just because I had to go.
Anyone else had that experience? —Beat It! COMPLETELY TRUE! everytime I go hiking i HAVE to piss no matter what! also, when I lived in santa barbara (isla vista), and I would be super drunk, id be too lazy/drunk to walk to the bathroom. I would often open the window and urinate out of it by standing on a chair and leaning my midsection forward. I liked it. I would laugh uncontrollably at the same time. —whoisnumbaone |
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000 |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 12:51 PM do improve my manliness, ive started shitting while standing —000 |
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foob2011 |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 1:12 PM anyone seen that Jackass video where they take laxatives and shit while running? —foob2011 |
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chix0r |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 2:44 PM >>I'm starting to hate it when chix0r posts because it's almost always something that sicks me out. This pleases me greatly. Also, troff? Wtf, bguirk? Troff is not a word. —chix0r |
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lexieho |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 3:07 PM ^ I MAY HAVE THOUGHT YOU WERE A CHICK....THIS WHOLE TIME. —lexieho |
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jizzgrenade |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 8:39 PM derek, yes you make a good point, it's because i'm lazy.
and cheers to the nature piss —jizzgrenade |
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acm323 |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 9:49 PM I know this isn't about females, but what the hell? My roommate's boyfriend lives with us. He pays no fucking rent. None! Anyway, he was once using the bathroom for 45 minutes. I think he took a dump and then took a shower. Anyway, I really had to pee, and finally decided to pee in one of my roommate's drinking glasses. I've done it a few times since, whenever dumbass is in the shower and is taking forever. I wash them after I do it. No big deal. —acm323 |
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John Lennon |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 9:54 PM Do you use a periscope to make sure the glass opening is lined up where it's supposed to be? What if you have a really long piss and you have to change glasses midstream? How do you hold yourself up for that long squatting down? Finally, why not just piss in the sink? —John Lennon |
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acm323 |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 10:00 PM
Edited Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 10:05 PM I just put it directly under my vadge. It works fine. I use pretty big glasses. I've come close to overfilling them but never have. EDIT: The kitchen sink? Come on dude! That would be really messy. —acm323 |
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John Lennon |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 10:47 PM It wouldn't be that messy! Just put some washcloths down first so you don't get splashback. It's better than missing the opening of the glass and pissing on the carpet/floor! —John Lennon |
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bguirk |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 11:00 PM I just put it directly under my vadge. It works fine. I use pretty big glasses. I've come close to overfilling them but never have. ZT's bangs comments cometh. —bguirk |
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foob2011 |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 11:04 PM fapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfap —foob2011 |
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Colin |
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Tuesday, March 11, 2008 at 11:10 PM When I used to drive long haul truck, peeing in a bottle is par for the course. There is a bottled water company (can't recall the name) with a larger opening so it's easy to not miss in the dark. Or you can stick your junk into a gallon water jug. I've spilled a few times. You really don't know for a few seconds because of the internal body temp issue... Pouring it out was always shitty because I wanted to put it in non used areas. Dog waste areas (they have them at truck stops), storm drains, etc. Roll through a truck stop in the heat of summer and roll down the windows. You'll get a nice strong whiff of pee and heat. Good times. —Colin |
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Southpaw |
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Wednesday, March 12, 2008 at 3:05 AM Gatorade, the best bottle to pee in by far. Put in your inlaws/room mates fridge, they'll just think it's Lemon Lime. —Southpaw |
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Masteel |
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Wednesday, March 12, 2008 at 7:48 PM Hell yeah. I sit down for any bathroom use from bedtime through the first pee of the morning - partly because I'm tired, mostly because I don't want to turn any lights on. Though I will do an occasional during the day sit down if I just don't feel like standing. The rest of the time I use a thumb on top, two fingers below method of aiming (I guess that would be the 'garden hose' method someone mentioned.) EDIT: If I'm in the shower and I need to pee, of course I'm gonna pee in the shower. —Beat It! Holy shit, I thought I was the only one, but you and bguirk? Uh oh. This must be something that happens when you get older. I just recently started doing this, cause when I turned on the lights at night, it would wake my ass up and I'd never get back to sleep after. I think I didn't have this problem with getting back to sleep 5 years ago, which is why it's never come up before.
—Masteel |
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Masteel |
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Wednesday, March 12, 2008 at 7:51 PM When I build my mansion I will have a troff like they used to at the ballparks/arenaas of my youth so I can take a nice safe communal piss w/ my brothers (no crossing swords). The troff will be for vomit and/or piss. Do not shit in my troff mother fuckers. —bguirk I too have had this dream. I want a completely stainless steel bathroom with a drain in the middle and a steam cleaning wand built into the wall. Easy clean up. —Masteel |
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miyagi-sama |
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Wednesday, March 12, 2008 at 7:52 PM I think the getting up to pee at night has more to do with age than the sitting down part. —miyagi-sama |
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bguirk |
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Wednesday, March 12, 2008 at 8:25 PM I think the getting up to pee at night has more to do with age than the sitting down part. —miyagi-sama How dare you. I can't even remember the last time I got up in the middle of the night to whiz. Once I'm out I'm in a coma for 9 hours or until the alarm goes off. Tonight we're supposed to have thunder at 4 AM so one of my pets could wake me up, but they usually have better luck with my wife. —bguirk |
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jizzgrenade |
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Wednesday, March 12, 2008 at 8:55 PM
Edited Wednesday, March 12, 2008 at 8:58 PM Gatorade, the best bottle to pee in by far. Put in your inlaws/room mates fridge, they'll just think it's Lemon Lime. —Southpaw all jokes aside though, so true, nothin better than the big 1.9 litre jug, always keep one in the trunk, and like colin said, the widemouths are geat —jizzgrenade |
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miyagi-sama |
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Thursday, March 13, 2008 at 10:33 AM all jokes aside though, so true, nothin better than the big 1.9 litre jug, always keep one in the trunk, and like colin said, the widemouths are geat —jizzgrenade So you're rolling down the highway and you need to pee. You stop to get the jug out the trunk, start going down the highway again and pee in the jug? OR you do this in the city, so you stop in a parking lot where you are probably no more than 50ft from a building with a public toilet? Genius. —miyagi-sama |
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miyagi-sama |
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Thursday, March 13, 2008 at 10:33 AM How dare you. I can't even remember the last time I got up in the middle of the night to whiz. Once I'm out I'm in a coma for 9 hours or until the alarm goes off. Tonight we're supposed to have thunder at 4 AM so one of my pets could wake me up, but they usually have better luck with my wife. —bguirk Yeah but still —miyagi-sama |
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Sassafras Roots |
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Thursday, March 13, 2008 at 1:27 PM I think the getting up to pee at night has more to do with age than the sitting down part. I suggest you consider using diapers....
—Sassafras Roots |
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bguirk |
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Thursday, March 13, 2008 at 6:42 PM The odds are with you my friend. —bguirk |
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jizzgrenade |
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Thursday, March 13, 2008 at 8:40 PM well, whatever the hell your name is, i dont piss while im driving partially because i drive a stick, and partially because i'm not trying t kill myself, i would pull over, but i rarely take tong trips where that would be necessary. it's actually always just between classes where i only have time to run back to the car, or when i'm to lazy to finda toilet on campus —jizzgrenade |
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Dusty TheHick |
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Thursday, March 13, 2008 at 9:02 PM Ferchrissakes! How difficult is it to hold it long enough for a tong trip? They're available at your nearest Wal*Mart, I'm sure. 
—Dusty TheHick |
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miyagi-sama |
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Thursday, March 13, 2008 at 9:33 PM You're "to lazy to finda toilet on campus" so you walk to your car to pee and then walk back? Once again, pure genius. Are you Brian Greene? Kip Thorne maybe? —miyagi-sama |
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