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Masteel |
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Sunday, June 3, 2007 at 11:08 PM
Michael Bay. Love him or hate him, I think he’s the best director they could have picked for this movie.
Check this out. Yay! If that doesn’t give you a hard-on and want to cry tears of sentimental joy at the same time, then you’re dead to me. Can’t wait.
—Masteel |
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anobody |
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Monday, June 4, 2007 at 1:17 PM I've never seen Clerks II, but seeing that /\ really, really, really makes me think I made the right decision. —anobody |
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rAnCIDsICk@!!! |
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Tuesday, June 5, 2007 at 1:06 AM Ate some shrooms and saw the new trailer for Transformers when watching the new Pirates
and I was stuck with this shit eating grin watching big ass robots blow shit it up.
You know where to find me come July 4TH —rAnCIDsICk@!!! |
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mandeemoo22 |
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Tuesday, June 5, 2007 at 1:29 AM i bought transformers sheets for my new bed. everyone is going to think i'm awesome. —mandeemoo22 |
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rAnCIDsICk@!!! |
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Tuesday, June 5, 2007 at 1:31 AM And that would be me.... to the point of jealousy..
When you share a bedroom with a woman you kinda have no say on the color of sheets.
I do get the thread count vote for my skin is royalty and should be treated as such when
I leave traces of my pubic hair after the act of coitus. —rAnCIDsICk@!!! |
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MajandraFan |
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Thursday, June 7, 2007 at 2:46 PM You kind of phrased that badly Masteel. Why would he be the best choice if I hated him?
I really really really like Bad Boys but don't like anything else by Michael Bay. The guy seems like a typical John Hollywood dick. The kind where you wonder if he's pretending to be that autistic or if he was placed on the throne just because he's the kind of unaware lunatic who will never need to be told "you can't say that in a film". Um, that movie looks so fucking terrible. Forget for a moment that they are making a new movie of The Transformers and the star is Even Stevens... the story is awful. John Hollywood always changes stuff for no reason. Why? The only things that shouldn't be original are changed and the only things that should be inspired are lame ripoffs of good movies from the last x years blah cock fuck. as usual for this kind of technically demanding work, humans are put at the forefront of the story because it is cheaper and easier. Who cares if it's nothing like the cartoon?
The special effects are the kind of fan service lame shit that has infected everything produced out of North America since I don't know when. The concept art for Optimus Prime in this movie and Zeratul in the new StarCraft II game both reek of the same "omg i such a good drawer and this will be the coolest shit ever" attitude. It stinks like sterile semen. Fuck off you losers! I hate those lame artists. They are the product of a middle class coddled by military dominance. Nothing must interfere with the flow of young people into the ranks. No art, no technology, nothing. Kill everyone who interferes with this. every time they do something like this they fuck it up. He-Man, Superman, Spiderman, X-Men, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, the newest Batman movies, Daredevil, everything. Always fucking it up. I felt sentimental when I got the box set of Ulysses 31 and watched the trailers. Each trailer was only the opening credits of the show because that's all you need for the target audience.
M.A.S.K.
She-Ra
He-Man
Transformers Fuck the music for Transformers always takes me back to the middle of the 80s. From the first episode on the same morning as my first swimming lesson to watching episodes in summer 86 around the time of my sixth birthday when I got that plate and cup set featuring Megatron and Optimus Prime. And don't get me started internally about trading cards and the bubblegum smell and driving around country towns and back into Canberra on a Saturday... 1987 yay! Sigh. I won't ever watch this movie. It's fucking shit. —MajandraFan |
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Masteel |
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Thursday, June 7, 2007 at 4:46 PM Because his particular ability, some hate it some like it, but his ability seems a perfect fit for this movie. —Masteel |
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plurry |
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Friday, June 8, 2007 at 4:15 PM adults who like star trek, transformers, star wars and the ilk..
deal breaker. —plurry |
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MajandraFan |
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Sunday, June 10, 2007 at 1:38 AM I like all those things. I think you should append 'geek' to those. I don't think burning all bridges with childhood is terrible. There's a difference between being fond of them and living breathing them.
Or am I just in denial about how much of a loser I am? —MajandraFan |
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Masteel |
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Sunday, June 10, 2007 at 11:11 AM Well, MF, if you didn't like the Batman with Chrisian Bale, and you didn't like Spiderman 2, then you're right, there's no hope for you liking any comic book/TV cartoon movie, because both of those movies got it about as "right" as you can get it. That being said, there's something to be said for the fact that the fans were able to make such an uproar that they got Peter Cullen casted as the voice of Optimus Prime for the movie (the original voice over actor that did Prime in the cartoon), so there's at least one part of the cartoon that transferred directly to the movie. Was Starblazers by chance a cartoon you watched as well? —Masteel |
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anobody |
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Sunday, June 10, 2007 at 10:17 PM Well, MF, if you didn't like the Batman with Chrisian Bale, and you didn't like Spiderman 2, then you're right, there's no hope for you liking any comic book/TV cartoon movie, because both of those movies got it about as "right" as you can get it. I'm not a huge fan of the comic book movies, but I did like both of those quite a bit. —anobody |
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MajandraFan |
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Wednesday, June 13, 2007 at 2:38 AM I strongly advise against: I haven't seen the Batman with Christian Bale, I couldn't bear it. It looks so awful.
Christian Bale doesn't seem to be a good actor. In every clip I've seen he doesn't seem anything like Batman. He's kinda like the opposite of Michael Keaton; he looks the part but can't pull it off.
Michael Caine is capable of hiding in a character but mostly film makers want Michael Caine in their movie and that's what they've got in that movie. Alfred is a sweet character, why replace him with Michael Caine?
I forget who the other actor is like Michael Caine in this movie but it's not good. Let me look it up.
The tip off for how bad a movie this is is its sheer unnecessity. That's not a word. There were two sweet Batman movies a decade ago and two lousy sequels then they try and reboot the franchise? Why? Money or horrid ego are the only reasons I can think of, unless you want to go into hyper-conspiracy about the breaking down of icons (and that explains the new Star Wars movies too).
Let's see, Liam Neeson must be the one I'm talking about. Christ, Katie Holmes? Gary Oldman is a good actor when he wants to be but his presence in a big budget Hollywood movie is a good sign it sucks. I know that it might seem a bit thick/thin depending on your accent that I'm saying the movie is terrible having never seen it but really, the Hollywood soap opera goes on and on unchanging. Much like Home and Away or Neighbours, it doesn't matter how long I stay away from Hollywood, every time I go back and genuinely try and watch a Hollywood movie and enjoy it I get burned. They're the same crass nonsense with the same arrogant ads (and why does everyone call them 'trailers'? They're just ads).
I've seen more than enough snippets of Batman Begins to know how terrible it is. I wish I hadn't seen as much as I have.
It's the same for movies like X-Men, Lord of the Rings, Spider-Man. ===============================================================================
I haven't seen anything of X-Men 2 or 3 except snippets and it all looks terrible. I have seen X-Men 2 or 3 times and it was just as bad as its ads suggested. I've tried to avoid Lord of the Rings because I knew from the moment it was announced that it would be John Hollywood. And when I saw one of the merchandise figures in a shop around 2000 I knew I was right. The character design was an incredible cliche. The film makers must have gone through the vast repository of paintings and drawings of Tolkien's work done over the years by dozens of artists and picked the least interesting and authentic examples to base their movie off of. The casting was horrible too. Those idiots they put in as hobbits, yuck. And that cunt from Pirates of the Carribbean? Cate Blanchett, yuk. Hugo Weaving is cool so I'm sure he did a good job but I'll never know because I don't want clouds of ink in the beautiful water the book gave me. Spider-Man looked god awful. I'd been gunning to see one ever since I saw the end of the Muppet Babies credits in the late 80s. Tobey McGuire. Fucking Toby McGuire. I have unfortunately seen Sea Biscuit in its entirety and most of Pleasantville so I know what a gormless actor he is. Who on earth thought he would be a good Spider-Man? I haven't seen the first nor the third but I caught the second on television a month ago. What a joke. For instance, the scene where he brings a train to a halt using his legs. The look on his face, McGuire proving he has down syndrome. Since when does intensity equal needing to take a shit? Why didn't his legs snap like twigs? Why did the whole thing look like a lousy computer game? Why was it so boring and filled with such pointless people? Bad actors, bad dialogue, background music that cost twenty dollars; the whole movie was a mess from end to end. The only way anyone could like movies like Spider-Man 2 and the others mentioned here would be as kitsch. They are not good movies. That's not an opinion. The technical shortcomings are so gross and benificient that a lack of awareness of such is only possible in the ignorance. We're not talking about whether strawberry icecream is a nice flavour or not. It's strawberry icecream made up of strawberry flavouring chemical and ground up pigs feet being passed off as rich creamy gelato with fresh strawberries.
And who would be proud of having bad taste? No, only with excuses and a silly smile would anyone actually like this movie.
Under the 'greater arc' theory no-one likes this movie as a good movie. If indeed it is a bad movie for everyone then people who don't know such are merely waiting to learn what a good movie is. Test the conviction of people who love this movie. How often have they seen it? How often do they watch it? Do they think of it in other parts of their life? Do they quote it? Etcetera. Batman Begins and Spider-Man 2 didn't get it right at all. The X-Men comic was adapted into a cartoon in the 90s, it was nice. That was done right. The Batman movies starring Michael Keaton are sweet, I love those. The cartoon that followed starring the voice of Kevin Conroy was maybe even better although it needed the Michael Keaton movies as a background, and the comics. It was werid. If you have never experienced any Batman before those, then it may seem a bit empty and presumptuous. Maybe. The Manbat episode, for instance, wouldn't have been as sweet if I'd never read any Manbat issues. The Kevin Conroy cartoon was almost like fan service done right, as against those Star Wars movies just made that are fan service gone mad. Why isn't Kevin Conroy a star? He's a great actor and he was handsome when he was younger. Haven't seen him for ages.
Batman Returns is such a sweet movie. Not a sweet 'comic book' movie, just a sweet movie. It's so sad and dark and fun and well acted and funny and everything. No-one needs to say "oh, it's good considering it's a comic book movie". Genre talk is always retarded but no genre is more apologetic than 'comic book movie'.
That's saying that either the source material is weak or it's impossible to translate any non-movie work into a movie.
I don't ever really hear anyone saying that a comic book movie is on par with the sweetest movies of all time. I like Batman Returns as much as Basquiat. But no, I like Basquiat as much as Batman Returns.
Then again I've never done much in the way of embracing 'great' movies and even if I had, I certainly wouldn't put them as a disclaimer when talking about movies based on comic books or fantasy books or something because I'm worried that people might presume me stupid or infantile or whatever. It seems stupid and infantile to be a pseudo-intellectual, swaggering around with your over-hyphenated sentences and whatnot. See, I went to a fireworks do last night and can't get back on track to what I was thinking. But as an example of how I'm always right about my assumptions of movies, I saw the first half of Minority Report last night. Exactly the thing I was expecting. Tom Cruise still can't act, his movies still suck, on and on. Couldn't get more than half way through it. So bad. I don't really see the relevance of Peter Cullen. I already knew about that, my brother told me excitedly a year ago. He said something about Megatron as well. I can't be bothered checking again now but the wikipedia page said that Hugo Weaving was going to be movie Megatron.
For an example of how old stories can be revisited successfully, watch the first season of Beast Wars if you haven't already. Before it was derailed by a merchandise agenda and possibly the lack of any real thought out conclusion for its mysteries (hello Chris Carter; by the way, The X-Files has aged worse than any other popular show from the 90s including Millennium. Everyone who loved that show was an idiot. It always sucked. I only ever watched because Gillian Anderson was hot. That's retarded too. Oh, and then I watched every week when Robert Patrick joined because he's hotter than Gillian Anderson. But no-one liked the show once there was a good actor on it. And Robert Patrick joined this millennium anyway, if I remember right.) Beast Wars was sweet.
I mean, they got Ian McDiarmid for the new Star Wars movies, did that make them any less than awful? No. They got the same actor for C-3PO as well, so what? If the people who love Transformers so much to call themselves fans really loved the franchise they would be boycotting this movie based on all the preliminary information available. But then again if they had that degree of intelligence or precognition then they wouldn't be adult fans of anything. They'd lock their love in their heart to keep them warm as they walk through the blizzard of this world, this life, this horrible fate. What? Shut the fuck up. I don't remember Starblazers. I will look it up. Maybe it's an alternate name for a cartoon I did know.
Ah, yes. I saw a trailer for it on one of the Astro Boy box set discs. That floating ship, it was familiar. However, I can tell you little about it without seeing an episode. I definitely saw it as a kid though. Wikipedia says it was Called Star Blazers in Australia. Perhaps it contains some of the epic armageddon scenes that I thought were in Astro Boy episodes but as yet remain unseen. I've ruled out Voltron and Robotech. Battle of the Planets maybe. Haven't seen all the Astro Boy episodes yet though. Don't want to plow through such sacred nostalgia. Anyway, could be partly Star Blazers too.
I will try to download the first episode and see if it's something fun to get one day. Those sweet box sets are generally over $100 here so if it's not one I really loved then I don't want it. Yes yes. I can't remember if I've ever put it on this board before but who really cares. I wrote a long ramble about this subject once on the ImdB boards. It got deleted when the thread fell off the back end. They don't archive there, or at least they don't make any archiving they do available to the public. It's basically a fraudulent summation of everything I've been talking about. I'll make up a short summary right now.
Okay, most movies are terrible. Anyone who says they like terrible movies in a genuine way just don't know how good movies can get. Scotty, you can be the martyr for the terrible art taste of the wider population. You didn't enjoy those movies. Really, you didn't. Fascism is gay.
Why can't I say it right today?
Oh, maybe that's what I'm forgetting.
Okay, it's presumptuous to say that a movie is good. All art yes but stay on movies. It's pretentious, it's pompous, it's tendentious. As a child one (like me and you) watches the world with wide-eyed autism because WE DON'T KNOW. We don't know anything! If the heart is being ripped out of the guy's chest I run out of the room of Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom and if Atreyu sees the Luck Dragon outside of those little elves' house after it's hurt to heal I feel all warm and fuzzy but I don't say that one movie is bad nor the other good, I just experience both of them. After very many years of watching movies I decide that I like this movie or that. Other people I know get into genres and types but I preferred to stick with specific movies. I don't hate action movies or love comedies even though the few John Hollywood movies I like these days are comedies and almost all action movies make me cry for the love of Lorenzo Lamas.
I know now that Mac and Me is bad in a lot of ways but it's still a good movie. It's good for me. If it's good for me then it's good. Period. Why? Because I don't need to include other people in my circuit. Anyone who publishes their opinion like critics (and you'll have to consider this a form or conversation rather than a le publishique) are either dishonest or unintelligent because anyone both honest and intelligent knows that all experience of movies is entirely subjective. It doesn't matter how educated or uneducated you are, it doesn't make any difference to other people outside of your brain. Should people aspire to the knowledge of Ebert and Maltin so they can share their taste? But then they will be them and still not have had their childhoods so they still won't be them.
What am I talking myself out of?
I know that all those movies are horrible. I know that they could have been made so much better. But it doesn't matter. The people who enjoyed them don't know what I know so they know what I don't know which is the enjoyment. So I don't know the good thing. But my anger feeds me no I feed my anger I can't stop.
Why did Eliza Dushku get a nose job? Stupid, stupid girl. Albanians are insecure or poor. Albanians don't exist. I will watch Spider-Man 3 in July at the ANU Film Group. I will wince at the clumsy acting just like I did in The Departed. Other people will be taken in because they haven't noticed. I notice. I can't forget that the cheap projector is cutting off the edge of the screen at the bottom whilst being poorly framed on teh sides. Some others will notice but easily forget. I will laugh at the awful moments almost involuntarily and people will turn around and glare. But that's because they didn't notice me glaring at their rapture. How can they be taken in by this? Why can't they learn to say no? Movies are a waste of time so if they're not enjoyable they're not a waste of time worth wasting wasting no. Um. Cat People. I want to see Cat People. I'll walk through the frozen city to dream again of what I never missed. I'm glad I never saw the 1984 remake. Maybe it was 1981. ============================================================== by - shatteredbluedreams (Thu Feb 9 2006 21:07:30 )
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I did not enjoy either of the X-Men movies.
I loved the X-Men cartoons and comics.
No-one takes comic book adaption movies seriously. Even if they enjoy the movies, no-one would seriously compare them to a movie like Croupier or Hush!.
The costumes are not realistic. No martial forces in the real world (soldiers, police, firefighters, etc) wear full body leather suits.
What is the point of taking an existing property and then discarding almost everything distinctive, unique and treasured about the property?
The X-Men comics following the movies are a good example of commerce trumping creativity. The X-Men cartoon following the movies is likewise a cashing-in. What is new? The characters are now North American high school students. Oh joy.
Hugh Jackman is a great actor. He was a cool Wolverine despite being a foot taller and not as broad as the Wolverine character. He didn't fit the comic exactly but he felt like Wolverine. Even in the soulless movie, surrounded by horrible actors, backed by a cliched score, tacked with pointlessly different metal claws (kind of the whole Wolverine trademark), he was Wolverine. If the movie had been filled with great actors then it still would have been watchable. It would have been an "alternate take", it would have been worthwhile art. Patrick Stewart is awesome. He makes the cheesy half-baked script sound like Shakespeare. Famke Janssen is definitely a good actress but she failed in these movies. Is it because she is not great or is it because she didn't know/care about the character? Who knows. The rest of the cast was uniformly awful. Cringeworthy. Teeth-grindingly embarrassing.
Comic book adaptations can be good. They can be talked of in the same breath as good original movies like the examples I gave before. They don't need a total reworking to achieve this. The source material stacks up to good original movies. The reason the adaptions fall short is because of the changes, not despite them. Great actors in every role (like Hugh Jackman), a great director, a great cameraman, a great gaffer. And of course great writing. It is possible. The movies inside your head when you read these comics can be put onto a screen. It just takes talent. Movies don't have to be The Phantom Menace. They can be The Empire Strikes Back. Sentiments like "don't expect too much" are not helping anyone. Art doesn't have to be a disappointing thing we settle for. There are people so talented in this world that it takes your breath away. Why settle for less when there is more great art on this earth than one can appreciate in 100 mortal years?
I don't understand the teenage-ising of all these comic franchises. Everyone is now a teenager or in their early 20's. This isn't the way these characters were created. Is it because the market is entirely young people? More than that, is the market composed entirely of people that demand to be able to live vicariously through these characters? If the characters aren't going to highschool as well they can't connect emotionally? It is interesting that The Hulk did not teenage the story. Bruce Banner (Eric Bana; Banner-Bana, how funny) wasn't re-enrolled, Billy Madison style, in school. Is this why the movie wasn't as successful as the perennially awful and trite Spiderman movies? The Hulk wasn't a great movie but it was okay and part of that is surely the lack of pandering to the injured psyche of the people so enamoured with the butchered stripped down modern versions of classic characters like Spiderman, Superman and now Batman as well. And of course the X-Men.
All of these movies have the stink of Horrible Cheap Sequels. Why is there a need for a new version of these stories every five or ten years? Why another Batman movie? Why a Spiderman movie when clearly no-one had any passionate ideas? Why another Superman movie? Why another Superman tv show? Why another Batman cartoon series? All these shows, and there are many more examples, are an attempt to make money. There is no spark, no new juice, no imagination. Some of these characters are almost a century old! That is fine, why can't we enjoy that classic work? Do people write a new version of Dicken's novels or Shakespeare every other year? Well, they do I guess, and they don't always own up to it but it shows my point: those adaptations are awful and so are these. Rather than keeping these fictional characters alive, these endless rehashings are destroying these characters in the greater sweep of history's arc. These franchises are becoming pulp fiction instead of classic fiction.
Why do so many people flock to these movies? Like so many heroin junkies or battered women, these people have Fear of loss. Star Wars fans are another classic example. Rather than universally revile and reject the sequel trilogy of movies, a great number of fanatics have taken them to their breast. What these fans and X-Men movie fans have in common is the fear of letting go of a cornerstone of their emotional wellbeing over years and years of good and bad times alike. It is really sad.
I decided, after years of artistic abuse from Hollywood, that movies are not the be-all and end-all of art. I was always so excited to hear about a movie version of one of my favourite tv shows or books or comics. Ninja Turtles movie? Awesome! Batman movie? Great! Phantom movie? All right! Super Mario movie? Sweet! My friends and I, and everyone else, would talk about how the movies might be. We imagined so much fun; the movies would be just like the source material but bigger, brighter, louder, more explosive, more real. We would be more immersed in the fantasy worlds we loved than ever before.
Yet always the movies were a let down. They always fell short. The atmosphere was non-existent, characters were changed in appearance and personality or omitted all together, story lines were changed inexplicably. Everything was different and none of us understood why. There would be the odd brief explicit reference to the original source material but always as a punctuating moment of comic relief.
The truth is, movies are not better than television or books or music. Great art does not need to transfigure into a movie to achieve its true destiny. If a movie falls short of the material it is adapting then let it, ignore it, forget it. Read the book again. Read another book. Watch a good original movie. A couple I know are getting married...
...the fools
============================================================== I can't remember any of the sweetness. Edit non. ==============================================================
Isolated by the step-down transformation required to communicate with them. If I close down most of my systems I can tolerate what they love, this is fact, so then is it their poorly functioning brains that... no, I don't want to think that.
I hate sitting in their lounge room, eating their lousy food, watching their awful movies on their cheap television. The case for poverty does not matter because they are at a point where they are not filthy with anger, shaking scarlet.
- morbid ignorance
or
- devastating forgetfulness
or
- surrender + defeat
or
- reconciled through meditation (the false path of buddhists)
There aren't many other ways they can deal with their squalor oh no that aren't covered in that little list. Are there?
oh
- incognito alien waiting for the invasion and/or a pick-up ship or whatever
It is wrong! If they would only vacuum, and spend all their food budget on good food instead of cheap food and cigarettes and lighter fluid, and only watch beautiful vistas (the world when they can't afford a nice viewing screen), and a super sweet movie instead of this laconic anti-buzz...
But I don't do any of those things. The only reason I don't smoke is because it's an effort to go out and equip. If it was easier, I would. Just like I live in all that other squalor. But I won't watch their lost stories. I won't do that. Bad movies embrace the paradigm. Jargon houses parasites. An artist, if he is truly an artist, wants to do the will of God, and he must. But since God does not exist the artist must only do the will of himself. Every fantastic movie has something different about it. They can't fit into a genre at first because there isn't one. One will be invented as a flattering and concise way of describing the legions of flatulent bloated liars who will jump onto the elephant like a pack of hyenas and bring it down. It is more profitable to make bad movies than good movies. Not bad movies for me but bad movies for everyone. Fantastic movies inspire and resonate. People glowing with energy won't trade their cash for a wheelbarrow of ashes, then claw through it for an orange warm ember. They don't accept pragmatic lies like YOU MUST GIVE ME YOUR MONEY and YOU MUST LIVE WITH SOMEONE YOU DON'T CARE FOR and MURDER IS COOL. It is called Subversion.
Subversive movies are a threat to established bastions of wealth because those bastions are supported and fueled by the lives of poor people. Poor people who are unhappy. Poor people who give their all in the all-encompassing and soul shredding essence envying 'society' nicknamed and misnomered as Capitalism.
The bastions of wealth are generally named governments and businesses. Many are truly neither and exist in the legal ether, where it's safe. And cloudy and clear and cold and impossible for a lone assassin to live and wait.
The deconstruction of beacons of love encapsulated by good movies is essential for the continuation of the current alignment of wealth bipolarity. Turnstyle artisanship is the only acceptable workable model. Watch the movie. Shrug and smile and let your liver process the processed sugar best it can. Feel high, think about the future movies instead of the sky, go home and forget everything. That is the Hollywood of John formula year in, year out.
But the model is crumbling underneath the technology glacier. The inherent indifference has lead to people abandoning their passions at an accelerated rate. Such a rate that the maximum profit point has been superceded. People trade bureaucratically illicit copies of movies through their computers with digital and analogue encapsulation. I myself pirate movies to friends and acquaintances on giant reel-to-reel tapes that weigh in at several tonnes for a complete 2 hour movie.
The underlings of the powerful people tell the population that they're stealing, that they're wrong, that they're bad people, but the true message of jaded penetration has sunk into the core of each and every one of us. We just want to fuck, we just want to come, and we just want to move onto the next person. We accept that we can never achieve the zero horizon so we move as fast as we can in lieu of stopping altogether. The people responsible for taking away perfect love are trying to steer us away from perfect hate. It cannot be done. BUT UTOPIA WILL NEVER BE REACHED because a new model will replace the old. The specifics are unknown at this time. The only definitives will be unhappiness and resource disparity. Spider-Man 3 will be the new glad grail for 5 holy seconds. It will be forgotten in 10 years. It is The Flintstones starring John Goodman. No-one wants it anymore because I can remember my future.
Cat People will be the b-movie for a new hate film in several decades. It is a film of passion so it will never stop until all our archives are destroyed by something so alien, be it intergalactic or our own inter-evolutionary selves. One day this world will burn. Not this earth, but this human existence. It will not continue forever. Cat People may have been born of the sickness. But just as we were the chosen bacteria, it can be the rape that brings a happy child into the world. Scandal'Us have a purity that Nirvana do not. I can't do movie analogies because I have never had an interest in carving that golden goose. I hate bonus features. The 2 disc edition of Hot Fuzz is not available in Australia yet but the UK copy arrived today. When other people boast of having a copy early I never cared. What does that falling star matter? Yet I feel like showing people, look!, I have it now and it's awesome!
And we've burnt a copy for someone I do not know, already. There is nothing wrong with it even though that movie and our consumerism exist outside of (or less naively, resentfully within) the Disposable Zeitgeist outlined in this nonsense manifesto. A ten point plan: 1. Manifestos are useless. These Spider-Man movies are the most disgraceful raping of a franchise I've witnessed in recent centuries. No but no, it is so weak.
The thousands of words written hourly about movies are borne of the simple reality that when you finish watching a movie, you feel dead. I watch movies without snacking so I know this is always true. You wonder: what now? And there is no easy answer. As all people born beyond the daily existence struggle will tell you by example, life is utterly pointless. In such a self-aware disparaging depression, how can our species ever make a movie about anything? All there is to do is orgy and orgy on our self-awareness, in the same sickening way that tribes of monkies fuck each other silly until they need to eat or sleep or hunt or tear apart some smaller monkeys or whatever the fuck monkeys do when they're not fucking.
That is why it doesn't matter that The Wings of Honneamise is more sophisticated than and that gifted film makers must be mentally ill.
Mac and Me is a better movie than ET. The product placement is so overt as to be nullified whereas ET contains genuine product placement, not only for perishables but also for the worst aspects of north american post-holocaust homogenous living. The actors are better. The only person who is famous now is Drew Barrymore and only because she was radiating sexuality from the ages of 14 to 24. That's not an important point because the entire cast of Mac and Me are dead.
I watch ET and feel bored and nauseous. I watch Mac and Me and laugh because I secretly want to have sex with children. The boy in the wheel chair is so fucking sexy! I laugh so much I haemorrhage my nose and bleed, cackling, wishing I could let myself masturbate to my infantile fantasies.
I do like that movie and don't eat at McDonald's restaurants. The opposite is true for people who spit on my lousy taste. I spit on you! I don't know what to say. Footrot Flats was so dull and essential. Jackie Brown was good but I never want to watch it when I'm choosing a movie. Casshern is so awesome but no-one can defend it with literacy. The only defence is "I like it." So why attack other people for liking what I hate? I have already thought why and said why, because all behaviour suggests otherwise. When I like a movie, I keep it both in the real world if possible and in my heart. People who like the Generica Carousel collection of movies represented so well by the stuff I want to throw away, like these new Spider-Man movies, go through their loved jewels like a seasick anaemic bulimic at a cruise ship sushi train. I don't know if cruise ships ever have sushi trains. They're probably run by Vietnamese. I want to write ten thousand or twenty thousand more words for no-one to read but I am tired. I guess next time. Tomorrow. Soon. Later. Or give up now. There is nothing to say new here new eternal time indelible. It's a waste. When I saw the video clip for Can You Feel The Love Tonight? by Elton John on a Sunday morning in March 1994, I loved it so much. The movie looked really good and I wondered when Disney's streak of good movies ever more profitable would be broken. Very soon. It scares me to remember that moment (as I listen to William Hung sing that song) in just the same way it scares me to see Cricket and Tom and the gang of Hawaiian Eye because it's Just Like Now. There were in fact many things about me at 14 that were more childish than I wanted to admit and despite the nothingness I have become older, more adult. Not just more broken. But not that. That moment. I was the same then in that aspect as I am now when I'm touched by something. I don't understand what of me is touched nor how, but it's just like when I hear the beginning of Sandpit by Curve or watch the ballroom scene of Batman Returns. Or that bit in Basquiat when Sonic Youth is playing and he does the sketch of Gary Oldman's character's daughter. Could be why Sigur Ros don't use words and Barry Adamson didn't sing for years and years. When MacLeod is promising his bonnie Heather about the candle. Or watching an episode of Farscape, flaws and all, trying to turn ice into transcendental ions that I can send directly into the mind of other people.
It was a failure. My hand's up. Not because I have the answer. I know all those answers, of course I do, and not just as a parrot either. But I can't answer the questions that such mastery has taken me to so I don't see the need to answer the others. So why is my hand up? Because I have to be heard and I can't answer the why of that either. Nothing to say but still must say something.
I hate being alone!
I hate bad movies!
I hate seeing people enjoy bad movies!
I hate people looking down on bad movies I love!
I hate nothing!
I love nothing!
I hate everything though. Even though there is precisely zero Justice Logic in my heart, I can dissect YOUR TASTE in a way that is more amusing, persistent, drowning and incisive than anyone else, for you are all THE YOUR. Despite this I still wish I could just ease up the empty feelings and then I could be at peace with our disparaging disparities. This is me holding back, especially in terms of wit but that's something my ego says in fear. Maybe if I could be as nasty burning acid as I could be then I could be more amusing. I know it's kind of true because I get on my high horse like Micallef and crack people up in real life. "Write it down! You should do stand up!" I fucking hate standups too. They're just film makers incapable of getting their shit together. Except for... no, even Sandy Gutman. Fuck God I hate god., —MajandraFan |
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plurry |
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Wednesday, June 13, 2007 at 12:13 PM i don't understand adults who like comic books, comic books turned movies, uber fantasy stuff like LOTR, etc.
i liked all that shit when i was 12. then i got pubic hair and that put the kibosh on all that. the older i get the more disinterested i am in fiction. i like stuff that really happens. the last movie i watched was back in december. it was wonderland with val kilmer. it's based on the "wonderland" murders that john holmes was one way or another involved in. i fucking loved it.
everyone should see it. —plurry |
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John Lennon |
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Wednesday, June 13, 2007 at 12:33 PM That was MF's best post EVER! EVER! "like a seasick anaemic bulimic at a cruise ship sushi train" I'm still laughing at that. —John Lennon |
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MajandraFan |
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Thursday, June 14, 2007 at 2:14 AM nothing really happens. all art is fiction.
um, okay music is fiction. you don't just like non-fiction audio, right?
well, it's just that but in other ways. gosh, only drake digs it? —MajandraFan |
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000 |
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Thursday, June 14, 2007 at 6:58 AM the trailer does make it look well done. although i expect these typ of movies to suck —000 |
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plurry |
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Thursday, June 14, 2007 at 2:06 PM i'm talking about movies and books.
music is totally different. —plurry |
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MajandraFan |
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Tuesday, June 19, 2007 at 9:40 AM if you say so. where does the Richard Burton narrated War of the Worlds fit?
Jeff Wayne did an album with Catherine Zeta-Jones? —MajandraFan |
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Masteel |
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Saturday, June 23, 2007 at 10:13 PM
Edited Saturday, June 23, 2007 at 10:13 PM July 3rd. Can't wait. —Masteel |
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MajandraFan |
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Friday, June 29, 2007 at 5:59 PM Even though it's been happening steadily for the last 2 years, I can't handle Shia lawhatever becoming a star. I mean, what the fuck? I've seen at least 10 different episodes of Even Stevens and goddamn, what the fuck?
No-one let Jaleel White become a star, and Grown Ups was better than any of Shia's movies thus far. And Grown Ups wasn't that awesome. —MajandraFan |
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lexieho |
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Friday, June 29, 2007 at 6:08 PM Could be why Sigur Ros don't use words and Barry Adamson didn't sing for years and years upbllarrrghhghhg...[me puking on my keyboard] i like how icelandic and hopelandic is "not using words"
ps. LOTR was epic, but the imaging was really off, but it was better than tolien's shit, his drawings are very bland. Xmen had picard in it, true story.
i've never seen this thread before, how did i miss it? —lexieho |
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adams_babymomma |
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Friday, June 29, 2007 at 6:15 PM
Edited Friday, June 29, 2007 at 6:38 PM I'm Megan Fox NOT! :( btw this girl looks a lot like her here's her myspace (for the pervs)
i got it from the imdb boards under the megan fox discussions. —adams_babymomma |
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MajandraFan |
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Friday, June 29, 2007 at 7:59 PM
Edited Friday, June 29, 2007 at 8:00 PM i wish i hadn't seen that picture already from the very same source.
i like megan fox's tattoos. they are so bad that they destroy the power of her perfect profile.
and i like tattoos more often than not. that's how lame they are.
take the shakespeare one. it's bad enough for a sex kitten to have that on her back, but as a misquote? too much too much. i thought sigur ros sung in a made up gibberish. that's what my brother said. he said he read it in the liner notes or something. i can't remember, that was two years ago.
either way, i can't understand it. i was going to say any more than mika nakashima or namie amuro or lily chou-chou but i pick up a word here and there when they sing. Patrick Stewart is awesome. —MajandraFan Tolkien drew with his words, lady. when it is time we will know what it means!!!!! —MajandraFan |
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lexieho |
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Friday, June 29, 2007 at 8:10 PM icelandic- believe it or not is a language. hopelandic- is a made up language formed by the band.
read the wikipedia someone has been adding to it [me!?]
tolkien drew with his maps, even if the locations of certain places changed over the years, tricky old man. [i killed him!?] —lexieho |
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MajandraFan |
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Friday, June 29, 2007 at 9:49 PM i wont read the wiki just because
i can tell by listening that most if not all of their music is gibberish. icelandic doesn't sound that different from scandinavian languages. —MajandraFan |
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lexieho |
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Friday, June 29, 2007 at 11:12 PM but it's also really slow. compare thom yorke/radiohead to normal english. —lexieho |
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pookie |
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Saturday, June 30, 2007 at 6:08 PM Sorry, Maj. USAWeekend is calling Shia "the next Tom Hanks." —pookie |
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greymatters |
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Tuesday, July 3, 2007 at 11:30 PM Shia was sweet on Project Greenlight. Megan Fox needs to be killed. Sigur Ros is awesome. —greymatters |
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lexieho |
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Tuesday, July 3, 2007 at 11:33 PM i wish jonsi' was into teenage girls. i would let him ebow my strings all night long? —lexieho |
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lexieho |
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Wednesday, July 4, 2007 at 9:37 AM ^ ?
you saw a gay icelandic man having sex with me?
—lexieho |
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Dusty TheHick |
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Wednesday, July 4, 2007 at 5:21 PM
Edited Wednesday, July 4, 2007 at 5:21 PM Shia was sweet on Project Greenlight. I went to high school with Chris Moore. Fun true fact. —Dusty TheHick |
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chix0r |
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Wednesday, July 4, 2007 at 5:32 PM ..it's called marketing? —chix0r |
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MajandraFan |
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Thursday, July 5, 2007 at 7:39 PM everyone's been saying this movie is awesome.
no-one i know, cuz i don't know anyone, but people that know people i know. wait.
anyway, i still say it will suck.
am i wrong? am i wrong?
no, i'm not wrong, i'm just an asshole. wait. —MajandraFan |
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rAnCIDsICk@!!! |
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Thursday, July 5, 2007 at 10:32 PM I'm an 82' baby and Transformers are a sacred thing of the past to me.
I don't know any dude that was born around the same years as me and did not cry as a child when Prime died. So when a featured film was proposed I was completely skeptical to the notion.
Anyone ever seen "Captain America"? Even the previews left me a little off and of course the new bumblebee. Saw it today and it was exactly what it should be.
A great SUMMER MOVIE THAT I THOUGHT WAS FUCKING COOL AS SHIT. Big ass robots blowing shit up and fucking each other up.
But it's full of marketing in the film but it's actually pretty funny to. Go see the movie and make your own opinions.
I'm happy I saw it in the theater and I'll def. buy the collectors edition DVD. —rAnCIDsICk@!!! |
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plurry |
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Thursday, July 5, 2007 at 10:44 PM i was the biggest transformers cartoon freak on my block when i was a kid and still have all my transformer toys. as an adult, i have no desire to see this movie.
i have watched some pr0n this week. i'm not sure what that's about, never been that passionate about it.
—plurry |
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mandeemoo22 |
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Thursday, July 5, 2007 at 10:51 PM I'm an 82' baby You guys! He put the apostrophe on the wrong side of the number, so instead of it looking like the year, it looks like he's saying that he is an 82 foot tall baby. How humorous! Laugh out loud! —mandeemoo22 |
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plurry |
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Saturday, July 7, 2007 at 11:35 PM oh yeah? well i actually own the original soundwave and have 4 of the little cassette transformers. 
i'm ready to smoke a bowl and dig out my old toys.
when i was a kid, i liked to play sports and whatnot with my friends, but i wouldn't let other kids play with my transformers, or any other of my toys for that matter. fuck them. you could say that i learned to enjoy playing with myself at an early age. —plurry |
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catloaf |
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Saturday, July 7, 2007 at 11:39 PM
Edited Saturday, July 7, 2007 at 11:39 PM i was the biggest transformers cartoon freak on my block when i was a kid and still have all my transformer toys. as an adult, i have no desire to see this movie.
—plurry I, on the other hand, didn't give a rat's ass about transformers as a kid, but lemme tell ya, I haven't wanted to see a movie so badly in years. I could not wait. Went to the drive in last night and saw it along with Evan Almighty, and, also got to see a live band play before the movies began. 'Twas a rawkin good evening all around. —catloaf |
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plurry |
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Saturday, July 7, 2007 at 11:49 PM
Edited Saturday, July 7, 2007 at 11:49 PM you have a drive-in there? i'm jealous. i can has drive-in? —plurry |
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catloaf |
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Saturday, July 7, 2007 at 11:53 PM Sorry, poor impulse control.
Yeah, there's a couple drive ins pretty close. We went twice this week. ROCK HANDS!
—catloaf |
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anfernee |
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Sunday, July 8, 2007 at 4:32 AM You guys! He put the apostrophe on the wrong side of the number, so instead of it looking like the year, it looks like he's saying that he is an 82 foot tall baby. How humorous! Laugh out loud! Bitch! I was gonna post this! —anfernee |
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MajandraFan |
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Sunday, July 8, 2007 at 11:17 PM This is the thread of bi.
i don't understand adults who like comic books, comic books turned movies, uber fantasy stuff like LOTR, etc.
i liked all that shit when i was 12. then i got pubic hair and that put the kibosh on all that.
—plurry i was the biggest transformers cartoon freak on my block when i was a kid and still have all my transformer toys. —plurry
Ate some shrooms and saw the new trailer for Transformers when watching the new Pirates
and I was stuck with this shit eating grin watching big ass robots blow shit it up.
You know where to find me come July 4TH
—rAnCIDsICk@!!! I'm an 82' baby and Transformers are a sacred thing of the past to me.
I don't know any dude that was born around the same years as me and did not cry as a child when Prime died. So when a featured film was proposed I was completely skeptical to the notion.
Anyone ever seen "Captain America"? Even the previews left me a little off and of course the new bumblebee. —rAnCIDsICk@!!!
I guess I'm going to have to write a glowing review in bad language, peppered with prescience.
That doesn't look like an original Shockwave. I'm sure you have the original, but is that a newer version in the photo? Put my memory bug at ease.
—MajandraFan |
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plurry |
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Sunday, July 8, 2007 at 11:22 PM my shockwave is in the storage room. all i know is that i got him in like '83 or around that era. i don't still play with my toys, it's just that i take good care of things and tend to not throw things out. even when i was a kid, i took care of my stuff. i have well played with "hot wheels" (also stored away) that are over 25+ years old that don't have a chip of paint missing. —plurry |
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chix0r |
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Monday, July 9, 2007 at 3:00 PM I still have all of my toys and stuffed animals and everything from when I was a kid, in excellent condition. I don't want to give them away, but I don't want to bring them with me when I move out, and I don't know what to do. —chix0r |
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rAnCIDsICk@!!! |
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Monday, July 9, 2007 at 3:39 PM I was talkin bout the first preview the one with the Mars Rover and the fact they
"said" Bumblebee wasnt a slug bug but a camaro so of course I was skeptical.
Proud to be prooved wrong. Plus a brain full of shrooms can make robots really cool.
—rAnCIDsICk@!!! |
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andrewwagner777 |
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Monday, July 9, 2007 at 8:47 PM I saw the movie and two words can describe it "Mind Blowing". Anyone else think those were the best special effects ever done for a movie? —andrewwagner777 |
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