My boyfriend (21) has been close friends with a married couple (26) for a while. It turns out that the girl has harbored threesome fantasies ever since she saw the threesome scene in Quills (a maid between two guys, everyone very happy). She imagines that the characters do this every night, and try different positions, and have a grand time. She and her husband tried it out one time with a gay friend of theirs, but he wasn't sure he was gay at the time, his penis was too small (apparently her husband's is 7-8" when "super hard"), and she didn't like it.
So, in present day, she wants to have a threesome including herself, her husband, and my boyfriend. I find this absurd; one really shouldn't fuck one's friends. They're not going to do it because I wouldn't be happy about it, but apparently it's going to happen when we break up. They also want to have "naked time" with the four of us, which would lead to fucking your own partner. Ew? I don't see the point. I don't want someone watching me fuck. My boyfriend says it's to "share in the sexual energy." Whatever.
Anyway, I think she's got some crazy idealized image of what a threesome is. I don't see the point of a threesome at all; I'm happy fucking one guy, and it's not like I'm going to want more stimulation; I don't even like to use a dildo when I masturbate because it's too much stimulation.
All of this leads to the question: do you have to be completely fucked up to want to have a threesome when you're in a committed relationship, or just a little nutty?
My boyfriend says it's to "share in the sexual energy."
Your boyfriend sounds like a delight. He owes you big time for that quote. Her husband sounds like a wuss. She sounds like a maniuplative bitch. I haven't ever needed "naked time" with another couple to have sex with the woman I'm with. It sounds they broke the "don't get married before 30" rule and that's half the problem.
To answer your orginal question--under the circumstances you described they have to be completely fucked up. She lets it become public knowledge that she wants to fuck your boyfriend? In what universe is that OK if a single girlfriend does that (other than the porn-a-verse) let alone a married woman. Bad times. Bad people
I was with two-chicks-at-the-same-time once. I honestly didn't care for it at all. They were cousins (seriously) so they didn't get down with each other if you know what I mean. It wasn't how I had fantasized about it - Mostly I was concentrating on trying to keep both of them busy at the same time, so it felt more like work than fun.
Mind you - This was me with two women... Not sure I could get into a guy/girl/guy situation in the least.
Chix, you know exactly what Adam and Drew have said about this type of behavior. I know it's hard to comprehend it just now but, he's trying to find a way to sabotage the relationship. Tell him to fantasize about it all he wants, but if his dick enters any orifice that isn't yours, you will break it off in the car door.
Monday, October 2, 2006 at 4:13 PM Edited Monday, October 2, 2006 at 4:16 PM
It's gonna be so weird if they cross swords. Especially if one of them likes it. Also I second Haze on destroying the corpus callosum if your boyfriend tries it. You seem like a strong woman, just tell him absolutely not happening. You know the girl is just going to end up being the ringmaster of this sexual cirque du soleil anyways.
i'm back to not liking your boyfriend. how awkward is it to be, "yep, honey, when you and i are done, my buddy and i are gonna bang the bejesus out of his wife." i couldn't continue knowing that somewhere in the back of his head he was dying to do this/ticking down the days until he's free to do it. tell him that you've always wanted to see him get butt banged and if his buddy will do that to him in front of you, then you'll go along with what he wants.
lol "sexual energy". what a load of shit. he's going to get into all that tantric crap someday isn't he?
>>how awkward is it to be, "yep, honey, when you and i are done, my buddy and i are gonna bang the bejesus out of his wife."
It's awkward to me to know that he wants to do it at all, but it's nice of them to respect my wishes and not do it while we're dating, right? I don't think he's ticking down the days; he said he wasn't "pinning all his happiness" on it or anything and he's basically indifferent about it. Not that I believe that, but still.
>>tell him that you've always wanted to see him get butt banged and if his buddy will do that to him in front of you, then you'll go along with what he wants.
He stuck a vibrator up his butt the other day, so he'd probably go for that.
Monday, October 2, 2006 at 5:58 PM Edited Monday, October 2, 2006 at 5:58 PM
but it's nice of them to respect my wishes and not do it while we're dating, right?
I don't know if it's nice of them. It's just what they are supposed to do. Saying "Okay, we won't have sex with your boyfriend" isn't a favor. It's normal behavior. Although, these people and your boyfriend are a little weird. But it takes all kinds I guess.
>>Have the guts to break it off, or continue to be used.
I'm not being used, you're weird. They're actually concerned for him because I've been telling him since we started dating that I'm not in love with him and we're not going to be together forever.
And..uh..he's just very..open. Yeah, that's it. Trying to find his prostate just to see if it would feel good, and all that.
I can smell your boyfriends patchouli from here chix0r. Yeah, this is a really weird situation. I'd umm, I dunno. I would never have a 3some with one girl and two guys unless she was like a 10 and I was drunk, and still, I wouldn't tell anyone.
maybe this is his "touche" to your "I've been telling him since we started dating that I'm not in love with him and we're not going to be together forever." i couldn't handle the "understanding" the two of you have to go on very long. the good in all this is that you probably won't marry the 1st boyfriend you spend a good chunk of time with. i've seen that horrible mistake made over and over and over in life.
i think A and D would question if you really don't love him/want it to last or just say that b/c you don't get the feeling he's all that into it- they always say girls are in denial in those sorts of circumstances- not sure i agree 100%. but i couldn't handle the- "hey as soon as we're over i'll mourn by engaging in a 3-way". could have at least kept that private even if that was the plan- sounds more like an attempt to be manipulative.
B.woman who wants to cheat + guy with novelty-low self esteem
There, I fixed it for you.
Tell him to fantasize about it all he wants...
Screw that - why don't you just preserve your dignity and break up with him now? If he's seriously considering this, he's done and just looking for a way out.
Probably no harm for the married couple either - if they're gonna do it, they should just take out their kids and get divorced.
I'm not being used, you're weird
".. it's not just a river in Egypt"
Used or not, you can do orders of magnitude better (even just within the pool of sploozers here). I know it sucks, but your decision isn't between ending it now and not ending it, it's between ending it now and ending it later, after he's given you a reason to and your self-esteem is eroded.
You people need to benefit of distance from the people you date in your early 20's. They're who get you ready for the decent people. In ohter words--don't tell chix0r dump her guy--she's smart enough to figure it all out and then some. If it were someone else I might say differently, but this is super normal. Vibrator in the ass? There's a freaking congressman trying to score with a 16 year old boy with IM. A vibrator in the ass in the context of a relationship seems quaint.
don't tell chix0r dump her guy--she's smart enough to figure it all out and then some.
Sure - eventually.... and, even then, figuring it out and acting on that aren't quite the same things.
Hopefully she's also smart enough to be able to benefit from other people's experience without having to make her own mistakes (not that I expect anything any of us say here to even remotely influence her).
Tuesday, October 3, 2006 at 12:32 AM Edited Tuesday, October 3, 2006 at 12:34 AM
Chixor I say cut and run and spare yourself the headache. First off, I'd imagine most women regardless or at least all the women I've known or slept with tend to knock a bitch out if she declares she's going to fuck your man.
2nd your goin to get a disease from that fag. He is gay and will give you the AIDS.
He stuck a dildo in his ass, he's willing to cross swords he's fucking gay. No straight dude says "to share in sexual energy" and "naked time" unless it envolves 2 women and himself. He's purposely including a cock in this scenario, Men Want to bullguard some pussy, not share it or dive into sloppy seconds. Watch how quickly their Threesome turns into the end scene of "Y Tu Mama Tambien" and he's bent over biting down on a pillow.
Save your vagina while you can, you don't want to put to many miles on that thing b4 you marry a rich dude. But do stick a toothbrush down your throat frequently to suppress your gag reflex and learn to enjoy to swallow semen and you'll be fine.
It seems like you two are together in a relationship of convenience, knowing that one of you will eventually break it off once you get the nerve. Guys are up for anything if they can get away with it and there are no consequences. The fact that your boyfriend is even considering it and telling you about it is a sign that he wants out. If he really wanted to stay with you, he would not tell you about it under any circumstance.
Tuesday, October 3, 2006 at 7:04 AM Edited Tuesday, October 3, 2006 at 7:06 AM
Guys are up for anything if they can get away with it and there are no consequences.
So dam true - I almost lost my wife and family and caused massive hurt before I woke up and started acting like a normal person - I guess I had the risk gene (or the A-hole gene).
The fact that your boyfriend is even considering it and telling you about it is a sign that he wants out. If he really wanted to stay with you, he would not tell you about it under any circumstance.
Not sure I agree with that - for myself If I told my girlfriend (wife) that kind of thing it would be because I hoped she would go for it! In fact I would not be surprised if he was already 'playing' with them. The four of you naked... well that sounds like an attempt to get you involved - sure they want to F each other in front of you and how much of a stretch is it before they start touching you? Just sayin'
I'm thinking that chix0r just really enjoys having sex with her boyfriend, so she doesn't want to just break up with him. I don't think there is anything wrong with that. Hold on to him until you're finished!
Tuesday, October 3, 2006 at 8:27 AM Edited Tuesday, October 3, 2006 at 8:30 AM
Yes - hold on with both hands because it's so very difficult (nay impossible) for attractive (or even unattractive) chicks to find a 'fuck buddy'.
If I told my girlfriend (wife) that kind of thing it would be because I hoped she would go for it!
I do not have that gene. Even one of the threesomes sanctioned by The Holy Pope (ie - me + two chicks) doesn't appeal much to me outside of fantasy.
Now, if I could get a harem of hotties who couldn't get pregnant, were free of all STDs, and wanted nothing but to please me, that would be a different story (I have got to get working on that holodeck thingy).
Tuesday, October 3, 2006 at 11:28 AM Edited Tuesday, October 3, 2006 at 11:30 AM
Guys are up for anything if they can get away with it and there are no consequences.
What if there are no consequences but they can't get away with it?
Count me as someone who isn't up for "anything." Threesome with another guy in the room? No thank you. "Naked time" with another couple and listening to them have sex while they listen and watch me have sex? No. There's a ton of shit that isn't on my menu.
Tuesday, October 3, 2006 at 11:53 AM Edited Tuesday, October 3, 2006 at 11:54 AM
Masteel and Dusty c'mon. You're only young for a short time and for God sake, why not try everything once? You know you'd do it too, and you'd like it and brag to your buddies about how you banged this hot chick, but wouldnt mention the other dude. Maybe you would. I dunno.
Ummmm.... thanks, but no thanks, Mandee (just try a local pub, I'm sure you can get someone even less age appropriate than me in short order).
Masteel and Dusty c'mon. You're only young for a short time and for God sake, why not try everything once? You know you'd do it too, and you'd like it and brag to your buddies about how you banged this hot chick, but wouldnt mention the other dude. Maybe you would. I dunno.
Meh. This reminds me of when Adam was talking about how when he felt his first boob, it wasn't significantly different from what he imagined (similarly having sex, etc.).
Aside from agreeing with B.G. and not being up for 'anything', I'm quite certain that even the things that I might enjoy (a large assortment of hot chicks rubbing their boobs all over me) would be better in my imagination than anything I could manage in reality (a couple of grey-looking chicks who just have me in the room so that they can tell themselves they're not gay, but otherwise exclude me from the festivities).
>>If he's seriously considering this, he's done and just looking for a way out.
He's not "seriously considering it" - he plans to do it. Just not while we're dating.
>>they should just take out their kids and get divorced.
They don't have any kids.
>>I know it sucks, but your decision isn't between ending it now and not ending it, it's between ending it now and ending it later, after he's given you a reason to and your self-esteem is eroded.
Well, one of us is going to end it at some point, I know that. I don't think it's about having the "balls" to do so, either; there's just no reason to right now. I wasn't looking for him, and I don't have any desire to find someone better for me at this point.
I seriously doubt he's eroding my self-esteem. The fact that he thinks a threesome would be fun has nothing to do with me, and it's not like I'm chasing after some guy who just wants to fuck me. I know he's fucked in the head; his parents are horrible people and I wouldn't be surprised if he did try to sabotage things..but certainly not consciously. He's said he doesn't even want to think about breaking up with me (he's never broken up with a girl - and they didn't break up with him over sexual stuff, either..they pretty much decided he was boring, which I've heard from them, not just him); say it's for whatever reasons you want, but he's definitely not looking to end it at this point.
>>...you marry a rich dude. But do stick a toothbrush down your throat frequently to suppress your gag reflex and learn to enjoy to swallow semen and you'll be fine.
I have no plans to marry someone rich; gag reflex I'm working on, but I've never had a problem swallowing semen.
>>It seems like you two are together in a relationship of convenience, knowing that one of you will eventually break it off once you get the nerve. The fact that your boyfriend is even considering it and telling you about it is a sign that he wants out.
Mancow hit the nail on the head. At least for me, I'm only in the relationship because I enjoy it; I know fully well it's not going anywhere. And I feel it's important, again, to point out that he's not "considering" having a threesome. I trust him not to do something he knows would hurt me. Of course, in his fucked up world, it's only cheating if you don't talk to your partner and get permission to fuck someone else first. He was also brought up to believe you never enter a serious relationship while you're young, and always keep your eyes open for something better, which is what I tell him he should be doing in this case anyway; I know there's someone better out there for him. Not that I'm sub-par, but we don't share the same interests or have compatible personalities, really. Or at least I don't like his stuff or his personality; he's never really said anything negative about mine.
I'm kind of making him sound like an asshole, but he's not; he's just got completely off-base ideas about sex and relationships. Which is why I wasn't even talking about him in my first post; like I said, I know he's fucked. I was basically just looking for some backup on my theory that the wife is insane, too. Anyway, aside from sex issues, my boyfriend really is a good guy - patient and attentive and all that stuff. He seriously lets me know he cares, not just by telling me, but by showing me that he enjoys my company and wants to be with me, even when we're not going to fuck. It would be awesome if liked him as much. And now I feel like Andrew, this is great.
Thanks Christ! Hearing that almost makes me want to turn to Allah.
I seriously doubt he's eroding my self-esteem. The fact that he thinks a threesome would be fun has nothing to do with me, and it's not like I'm chasing after some guy who just wants to fuck me. I know he's fucked in the head; his parents are horrible people and I wouldn't be surprised if he did try to sabotage things..but certainly not consciously. He's said he doesn't even want to think about breaking up with me (he's never broken up with a girl - and they didn't break up with him over sexual stuff, either..they pretty much decided he was boring, which I've heard from them, not just him);
To paraphrase the late Bruno Kurby, sex is never the reason - it just reflects underlying issues.
say it's for whatever reasons you want, but he's definitely not looking to end it at this point.
Perhaps not consciously, but I still speculate that the seeds of destruction have already been sewn.
Mancow hit the nail on the head.
and part of what he said was "The fact that your boyfriend is even considering it and telling you about it is a sign that he wants out".
I'm just sayin'.
And now I feel like Andrew, this is great.
I'm sorry (now I feel like an asshole).
Great, anobody. Now I'm going to go sit in the corner and cry and probably masturbate.
Uh hu. I'm sure you're both shocked and crushed Mandee. Don't forget to send pics to Laith.
Plurry, will you be my fuck buddy since anobody refuses to be mine? I realize you're in pretty high demand here, but we can cuddle and do ecstasy before/afterwards.
Saturday, November 11, 2006 at 4:21 AM Edited Saturday, November 11, 2006 at 4:22 AM
She and her husband tried it out one time with a gay friend of theirs, but ... his penis was too small (apparently her husband's is 7-8" when "super hard"), and she didn't like it.
So, in present day, she wants to have a threesome including ... my boyfriend.
—chix0r
Your boyfriend has an enormous, overbearing and violent penis? This is the question of the hour.
How about a four-some? I had the fortune of being in one, and I seriously was stressing out. I mean, if i had 3 penises then fine, but with the misfortune of only having one.....
