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jjgold |
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Saturday, August 6, 2005 at 9:22 AM Boys....as some of you already know on Saturday mornings I like to do something special and treat myself to breakfast at the Howard Johnsons down the street. The establishment does not have the signature blue roof but the facility is still top notch. I have been patronizing this place for over one year. Well, this morning I felt like ordering an omelet but I was in kind of a hurry because I was going to Del Mar to watch the morning workouts and handicap the horses. It was then I touched on a brilliant idea. I wanted to get the omelet in a tortilla kind of like a breakfast burrito. That way if I was running late I could just throw some money down on the table, grab the burrito, and be off. I told the waitress what I wanted and she said no problem. A couple of minutes later she comes back and says it is a no go. I say "what the fuck?" and she goes on to explain that the chef won't fill my order. He says he can put the omelet in a burrito but he would not add cucumbers. Everybody knows I like cucumbers because they have a great texture and make a really cool snapping sound when you eat them. The chef didn't think the cucumbers would taste good so he refused my order. Who is this jackass to tell me what to eat? Needless to say I got really upset. I called the waitress a cunt and left without paying for my pineapple juice. I am done with that place. —jjgold |
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Passionate_Man |
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Saturday, August 6, 2005 at 9:38 AM i was expecting you to rain hell down on them. cucumbers would lose that crisp coolness in an omelet anyways. you shouldnt have called the waitress a cunt, it wasnt her fault. —Passionate_Man |
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Blitzen |
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Saturday, August 6, 2005 at 9:49 AM Can you imaging taking shit from the chef (NO NO NO, the cook!) at a Howard Johnson's in the morning. That poor waitress. —Blitzen |
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Dubious Merit |
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Saturday, August 6, 2005 at 10:56 AM Jjgold, do you ever eat cucumber sandwiches? I am an ardent devotee of the lost art of making tea sandwiches, and chief among the tea sandwich is the cucumber sandwich, made with thinly-sliced, seedless cucumber. The secret to a good tea sandwich is to freeze the bread for an hour or so before assembly, then to lightly butter it before applying your chosen spread. The freezing helps the bread stay stiff while being buttered and cut, the butter shields the bread from the moistness of the filling. When I make cucumber tea sandwiches, I mix the freshest mint leaves in a Cuisinart with 1/4 a cup of unsalted butter. After sitting for a while for the flavor to steep, this mint butter is the perfect endpiece for a filling of thin cucumber slices. It is important to dry the slices of cucumber in a paper towel before making the sandwich; moisture will ruin the integrity of the bread. —Dubious Merit |
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foob2011 |
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Saturday, August 6, 2005 at 11:11 AM
Edited Saturday, August 6, 2005 at 11:11 AM why did you waste time lashing out at the waitress, I would have gone back into the kitchen and ripped the cook a new one, you need to go right to the source —foob2011 |
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plurry |
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Saturday, August 6, 2005 at 12:36 PM "no, cannot have cucumber omelet burrito! no deal! next!" —plurry |
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chix0r |
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Saturday, August 6, 2005 at 1:46 PM I hate how "no! cannot have!" was completely replaced by "no deal." I think the fact that it disappeared without a trace takes away its credibility, and therefore humor. —chix0r |
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AbsolutCarib |
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Saturday, August 6, 2005 at 2:25 PM Look is there anyway we can freeze this guy? what a chump. He stole pineapple juice. —AbsolutCarib |
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jjgold |
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Saturday, August 6, 2005 at 3:34 PM Dubious Merit.......thanks for the recipe. Sounds delicious. After the game I am going to go to Whole Foods to get the ingredients. I will make them tonight. I am looking forward to it and I may actually drink some high end tea like Earl Grey in order to get the whole experience. —jjgold |
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mandeemoo22 |
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Saturday, August 6, 2005 at 8:42 PM Oh my, jjgold, you can't be real. I swear, I laugh at loud at every single one of your posts. You're such a character! I love it. One day I'm going to write a play with you as the main character. —mandeemoo22 |
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Dubious Merit |
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Saturday, August 6, 2005 at 9:03 PM JJGold - I hope you enjoy them. Be sure to use soft white bread, and cut off the crusts. When I have friends over for a game (alas, I am not a high roller; we generally play board games or RPGs) they are amazed that such delicate-looking little sandwiches can be so delicious. I will make three different kinds of tea (or "finger") sandwiches and array them on three nice plates. In this hot weather, I serve jasmine iced tea. Sometimes I have two pitchers, one of Earl Grey and one of jasmine oolong. Ordering out for pizza is low-class, and greasy to boot. With quality finger-food, the cards and dice stay nice and clean and the level of discourse is elevated.
—Dubious Merit |
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bguirk |
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Saturday, August 6, 2005 at 11:25 PM DM--even though I gavae up RPG's a long time ago I want to come over for your finger foods. I will bring my glass of drinking with me. —bguirk |
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bguirk |
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Sunday, August 7, 2005 at 4:14 PM don't forget your boots of shit-kicking. —bguirk |
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Dark Laith |
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Monday, August 8, 2005 at 10:30 AM You are in a dank, ominous forest. Bizzare noises are coming from within. What do you do? —Dark Laith |
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Dubious Merit |
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Monday, August 8, 2005 at 12:58 PM Actually, we're playing Call of Cthulhu in 2.5 hours. It's a one-shot, but CoC PCs don't have a long lifespan anyway. Gotta vacuum! —Dubious Merit |
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Ovid |
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Monday, August 8, 2005 at 8:09 PM Gay nerds? —Ovid |
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Ovid |
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Monday, August 8, 2005 at 8:33 PM Well, they are the best kind of nerds. —Ovid |
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Dubious Merit |
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Monday, August 8, 2005 at 9:46 PM Well, we had a lovely time; thwarted the cultists and all the sandwiches got eaten. On the menu: Jasmine/green tea
Honeybush/black tea
Cucumber sandwiches on white with cream cheese-mint butter
Cheddar chutney sandwiches on wheat raisin with sunflower seeds
Watercress egg salad sandwiches on dill rye with chive butter Everyone ate the dried flower garnishes and nobody ate the toothpicks. Perfect! —Dubious Merit |
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plurry |
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Monday, June 9, 2008 at 2:39 AM i was so happy when i came across this jj classic. i mean, i literally came across the screen. —plurry |
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airking32 |
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Monday, June 9, 2008 at 2:48 AM lol jjgold. could that guy have POSSIBLY been real? —airking32 |
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bguirk |
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Monday, June 9, 2008 at 3:23 PM please don't speak about him in the past tense. It makes me sad. Just like Jesus, he will return. —bguirk |
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mandee |
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Monday, June 9, 2008 at 5:56 PM anyone who is anyone knows that jjgold is real. we've seen the videos. —mandee |
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Dusty TheHick |
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Monday, June 9, 2008 at 9:45 PM I'm getting a huge wave of nostalgia washing over me now
...or semen, whatever.
—Dusty TheHick |
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anobody |
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Thursday, June 12, 2008 at 5:48 PM lol jjgold. could that guy have POSSIBLY been real? There are degrees of real. Whatever the case though - he was definitely a funny guy. —anobody |
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000 |
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Thursday, June 12, 2008 at 5:51 PM i remember he lived in my old neighborhood of bird rock, in san diego —000 |
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jizzgrenade |
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Friday, June 13, 2008 at 12:05 AM
Edited Friday, June 13, 2008 at 12:05 AM this is amazing to me, you'd think he was a budding writer working on a neurotic and aggressive character, who scrapped it midway when he realized he'd gone too far. also. he talked a lot of shit obviously; much of which was an extreme exaggeration, no doubt. what do you think actually went down here; what was the actual script tat morning...
coul it have really ended with jj saying "you cunt", or worse, just "cunt!" and storming out? —jizzgrenade |
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