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Dubious Merit |
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Monday, April 4, 2005 at 7:42 PM
Edited Monday, April 4, 2005 at 7:43 PM (My apologies if you find this somewhat off-topic, but I think it's in the same vein as the show.) If you were poking around your friend or loved one's house or room (at a party or housesitting or you live with them; doesn't matter) and found a large cache of objects that made you reevaluate your view of them (women's lingerie, drugs, a crate of jerkey at a vegan's, "specialty" porn, massive amounts of ammunition at a hippie's pad, dildoes-n-vibrators under pretty much anyone's bed), would you say anything? I don't mean would you walk over to them and say, "Dude, you got hella buttplugs," but would you try to elliptically allude to their dark secret and see if they took the "opportunity" and brought it up? And a secondary question: do you think it's better to hide everything in one spot (reducing chances of discovery, but making it a potential bombshell) or spread out your various unsavory things among many different locations ("Well, I guess one nudie magazine's not that bad.")? I appreciate input/discussion.
[edit: spelling is hard.]
—Dubious Merit |
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Beat It! |
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Monday, April 4, 2005 at 7:46 PM Okay, you're not invited over. Um, no I wouldn't bring it up unless it involved body parts. And I'm more of a everything in one place kinda stasher. —Beat It! |
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mandeemoo22 |
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Monday, April 4, 2005 at 7:47 PM I would try to hint at the secret, but not directly just blurt it out. It's really hard to find a stash of weird objects and not be able to have an explanation. Or I would walk over to the area with the stash while the person was with me and act like I just accidentally tripped over it, so the person would have to say something. I would hide everything in one place. But, I would put it all in a very secretive place that no one would be able to find unless they were snooping because then if they found it and brought it up, you could say, "What the fuck were you doing going through my stuff?" Then the tables would be turned and you would think bad things about them because they snoop through people's shit. The focus would turn away from your stash. —mandeemoo22 |
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masonjar_condition |
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Monday, April 4, 2005 at 7:49 PM I find that keeping my blow up dolls, fake pussies and "specialty" pRoN! in public view keeps people from visiting you. Especially the grandparents. Nothing says FREAK! better than a DVD copy of "Midget Anal Bum Busters, volume 3" on the coffee table as a conversation piece. —masonjar_condition |
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shiner like a diamond |
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Monday, April 4, 2005 at 7:52 PM
Edited Monday, April 4, 2005 at 7:53 PM I wouldn't say anything to the person, but I would most likely tell everyone I knew about it. As for my own hiding places, I guess I'd just hide everything in one place. Spreading it out leaves too much chance of someone stumbling across something. Plus it would be strange to be snooping in someone's home and keep discovering weird shit everywhere.
When I was in high school I would housesit for neighbors all the time. I'd spend hours at other people's houses, carefully going through the entire place. I would read every piece of paper, receipt, diary entry, etc. I would look at each pill in all the medicine cabinets. Search for hidden cabinets or climb into the attic, hoping for a dead body or a brick of marijuana...Man do I miss housesitting. —shiner like a diamond |
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PureChaos414 |
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Monday, April 4, 2005 at 7:53 PM I'm one of those people who attempt to hide things, then realize that they're not very well hidden so just put them basically out in the open. It's better that way. —PureChaos414 |
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shiner like a diamond |
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Monday, April 4, 2005 at 7:56 PM
Edited Monday, April 4, 2005 at 7:57 PM This thread made me think of how what's weird for one person is totally normal for anther. Sure, certain things are always weird, but then there are toss ups.
Then I glanced around my apartment and in less than 5 seconds noticed: 3 typewriters, a copy of "The Encylopedia of Serial Killers", a poster showing a zombie drinking human blood, a wax bust of jesus (meant to be ironic), three copies of Sybil (all paperback), and a mug shaped to look like a pregnant woman's torso.
Hmmmm. —shiner like a diamond |
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Dusty TheHick |
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Monday, April 4, 2005 at 7:57 PM I wouldn't say anything to the person, but I would most likely tell everyone I knew about it.
I'm gonna go out on a limb here, shiner: You don't keep the same friends for very long, do ya?
—Dusty TheHick |
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Beat It! |
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Monday, April 4, 2005 at 7:57 PM
Edited Monday, April 4, 2005 at 7:58 PM "3 typewriters, a copy of "The Encylopedia of Serial Killers", a poster showing a zombie drinking human blood, a wax bust of jesus (meant to be ironic), and a mug shaped to look like a pregnant woman's torso.
Hmmmm." —shiner like a diamond "You a mormon?" —Beat It! |
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shiner like a diamond |
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Monday, April 4, 2005 at 7:59 PM "I'm gonna go out on a limb here, shiner: You don't keep the same friends for very long, do ya?"
First of all: How DARE you!
Second of all: I wouldn't do that to a close friend, but definately to one of those B-list friends, or someone I was only friends with for reasons relating to drugs or money.
—shiner like a diamond |
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Dubious Merit |
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Monday, April 4, 2005 at 8:08 PM I used to house-sit and babysit a lot, and I loved poking around in other people's things. However, I was sitting for my parents' friends, mostly, and so didn't really have anybody to tell, even if I had wanted to. I don't poke around in my actual friends' houses unless invited, but I have stumbled across things while just attempting to use the bathroom. Shiner, you have a good point. I have enough horrible things lying about (I'm thinking the fetal skulls and the Church of Euthanasia stock for starters) to make me an excellent patsy for pretty much any police investigation imaginable. I assume everybody I meet masturbates to some degree, but it would be weird to see their paraphenalia. I personally own enough marital aids to be a felon in Texas, but I don't put them out in a fruit basket on the coffee table. I think there has to be at least an attempt to hide incriminating objects, then the finder and the hider can maintain the polite fiction that nothing was revealed. —Dubious Merit |
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swifty |
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Monday, April 4, 2005 at 8:15 PM I wouldn’t say a thing about what I had found. I would feel that the porno, lingerie, or Vibro 8000 was stashed away so as to not be off-putting, and this was a concession made by that person (it is their home and not mine). I would defiantly put all my shitola in one place. That away, I can arrange for Adam’s post-mortem perverted stuff removal service to sweep my home with as little effort as possible and it would also thorough.
—swifty |
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Dr.Drew_boogie |
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Monday, April 4, 2005 at 8:18 PM Firstly, no I wouldn't do anything except maybe mention it a few years after and watch the reaction.
Secondly, how about not having anything to hide? Ever thought of that? —Dr.Drew_boogie |
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Dusty TheHick |
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Monday, April 4, 2005 at 9:54 PM ...but definately to one of those B-list friends, or someone I was only friends with for reasons relating to drugs or money
—shiner like a diamond
My, what a class act!
—Dusty TheHick |
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Drew, Please |
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Monday, April 4, 2005 at 11:10 PM I think 2 things are relevant in this situation. 1) What's your relationship with this person? If it's a good friend or loved one and you believe the "stash" could be harmful to them or indicative of a bigger problem, fire away and bring it up. If not, live and let live. 2) What kind of "stash" is it? Finding a virtual cornucopia of kiddie porn vs. coming across the "squirmy rooter" or a bag of weed in the nightstand are hardly the same, friend or not. This may be worthy of a new thread, but let's hear some original suggestions for great hiding places to stash whatever floats your boat. Inside outlets in a wall is always good if you don't need constant access to it and it fits. —Drew, Please |
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swifty |
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Monday, April 4, 2005 at 11:14 PM What's a "squirmy rooter"?
—swifty |
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Dubious Merit |
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Monday, April 4, 2005 at 11:29 PM swifty: I think "squirmy rooter" is a model name, not a generic, but I could be wrong. Last I heard, it was a dildo with an eccentric central rod and a crank at the end, kind of like a poor woman's Jackrabbit. I would link this but I'm lazy. D,P: I had great success hiding things within the cinderblocks of a cinderblock bookcase. They have to be kind of lined up, but if there's a piece of wood on top of them, nobody will look there. You can scratch yourself up if you have to retrieve your item a lot, though. Another good one: inside a wastebasket, between the lining bag and the basket. Especially at the bottom. Nobody will ever find this, unless someone else does the trash. For the right person, this is a good place. These aren't really anti-cop hiding places, more like anti-Mom. Also, I bet if you were hiding drugs, you could hide them inside the battery compartment of a vibrator - if someone found the vibrator, they'd assume that was the extent of the embarassing stuff they were going to find and not investigate further. If you have a fairly rootbound plant, so that you can lift the whole dirt plug by grabbing the stalk, you could hide small things under there. A suggestion I read somewhere is to get a big Tupperware container and a bunch of canned chili. Put your item in plastic and bury it in chili, making sure you can't see it from the bottom as well. Put the lid on and leave it; as it becomes more and more horrific and moldy, people will be less likely to search it. Obviously, you'd want a good seal on the lid, and make sure you didn't know anyone who would altruistically try to clean out your fridge. Similarly: I don't think anyone would dig in a catbox for contraband, and you can put a lot of extra litter in there so the cat doesn't excavate your dope accidentally. Now that I've reached man's estate and live on my own, I've mostly given up on hiding things, per se - I have a footlocker and a lock. The footlocker is easy to find, but nobody's looking in it. —Dubious Merit |
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Dark Laith |
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Tuesday, April 5, 2005 at 9:38 AM
Edited Tuesday, April 5, 2005 at 9:39 AM If I found a friend's stash/cache of something weird, I wouldn't say anything about it to anyone, but I would sort of file it in the back of my head and use it in future evaluations of them. I don't really like confronting people about stuff, or telling people about weird things other people do, but I spend lots of time evaluating people in my own head, so that's probably where it would stay. As for my own stuff, well, that's hard to say. Since my dad is a religious nutjob who has in the past threatened to destroy my novels and video games if I didn't give them up, I feel the need to hide things that aren't what you would consider "bombshells". If i had any such bombshell stuff I'd probably hide it all in one place, but I don't (or if I do nothing's coming to mind right now.) The stuff I do have to hide is spread out. I guess it's because I think maybe he'd be significantly more tolerant of finding one of my books or video games than if he found a porno mag or something. —Dark Laith |
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mandeemoo22 |
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Tuesday, April 5, 2005 at 9:53 AM My room is already so messy and no one (my mom) really wants to come in there anyway, so I don't have to do much to hide stuff. I have spread everything out though because my room isn't that big and if I put it all in one place, it would be too obvious. However, if I had my own house, I would put it all in one place. I used to keep pot in my printer and no one ever found it. I have stolen a few lawn ornaments from neighbors, especially those plastic people that people have on the lawn closest to the street and they have a little red flag that says "Slow". I thought I was really clever by stealing them and replacing the "s" with a "b". I also took a few mannequin body parts from where I work because they have so many in the backroom, so I figured that they don't need them all. However, I have shown almost everyone those, except for a few people, like my grandfather and mom. I think that when the family comes over for Passover, I'm going to just randomly walk through the room holding an arm. —mandeemoo22 |
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Dubious Merit |
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Tuesday, April 5, 2005 at 8:51 PM Yeah, that's a pretty good place. Even if someone is using your printer, there's no way they'll change the cartridge for you. —Dubious Merit |
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PureChaos414 |
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Tuesday, April 5, 2005 at 8:52 PM Unless it's me. I've changed more than my fair share of printer cartridges for people. —PureChaos414 |
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Dubious Merit |
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Tuesday, April 5, 2005 at 8:56 PM Wow! I live too far from you to lend you my printer - would you just send me the $60 anyway? TIA —Dubious Merit |
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mandeemoo22 |
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Wednesday, April 6, 2005 at 12:47 PM I just wouldn't let people change the cartridge. I don't really like people using my stuff anyways because I'm selfish, so there would be no reason for them to even be using my printer. —mandeemoo22 |
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thuro |
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Wednesday, April 6, 2005 at 11:19 PM I think that I have open enough of a relationship with most of the people I know that most hidden stuff would become a source of jokes. /sarcasticlaugh "oh, haha, you're a guy and you have a dildo, ha ha." Sure the person would probably turn beet red, but we'd both be laughing about it. Unless it's something really odd like a collection of bodily fluids/parts or illegal things like pedophile/beastiality pornography. In that case I'd probably keep it to myself or share with the police. I hate to rain on parties but that's me. I find it really hard to trust people who do things I feel that they shouldn't. Some new "friends" of mine from work smoke pot and I just can't bring myself to really trust them. I guess it's a slippery slope argument: if they're willing to cross that line, then what other lines will they cross, you know? —thuro |
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Dark Laith |
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Thursday, April 7, 2005 at 7:59 AM
Edited Thursday, April 7, 2005 at 7:59 AM Do you mean they smoke pot at work, or they just smoke pot? If the former, I can understand your sentiment, but if the latter, your reaction seems to be a bit much. I mean, yeah, smoking pot isn't the best thing you can do to yourself, but it's not like it makes them bad people or something. —Dark Laith |
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mandeemoo22 |
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Thursday, April 7, 2005 at 12:13 PM Dude, Thuro, you need to loosen up. You should try some pot. —mandeemoo22 |
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PureChaos414 |
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Thursday, April 7, 2005 at 4:21 PM Like I said, ignore him. Nobody will understand him except me. —PureChaos414 |
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PureChaos414 |
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Friday, April 8, 2005 at 9:43 PM LOL sort of... he's one of my best friends and posts on here even though i yell at him not to. —PureChaos414 |
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PureChaos414 |
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Saturday, April 9, 2005 at 8:48 AM
Edited Saturday, April 9, 2005 at 8:49 AM no he doesn't listen to loveline and i dont even think he knows who adam carolla is. lol. edit: okok youre right, i'm a selfish bitch. goddamnit. do you HAVE to say it infront if the kiddies? —PureChaos414 |
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mandeemoo22 |
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Saturday, April 9, 2005 at 8:02 PM AWWWWW! LIZ!!! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DID THAT! do you HAVE to say it infront if the kiddies? in [space]front! if the kiddies? Let's go with "of" instead. —mandeemoo22 |
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NYBret |
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Sunday, April 10, 2005 at 2:33 PM No! Please... I'm sure Chaos's errors were simply the result of her flustered emotional state. She didn't mean to defame the esteemed badge of the GP. I beg of you, save Corporal Chaos! —NYBret |
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PureChaos414 |
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Sunday, April 10, 2005 at 5:32 PM I'm sorry... Please don't make me turn in my badge. I've had some very confusing days!!! I blame it all on Bret. DAMN YOU! <3 ::swallows badge so Dusty cannot take it:: —PureChaos414 |
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Dark Laith |
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Sunday, April 10, 2005 at 5:38 PM That's it, now the only solution is to cut her open to get her badge. May I do the honors? *pulls out a serrated knife* —Dark Laith |
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mandeemoo22 |
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Sunday, April 10, 2005 at 5:55 PM She's running away with the badge! Somebody go catch her! *sits on the floor and eats Skittles* —mandeemoo22 |
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Dark Laith |
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Sunday, April 10, 2005 at 5:55 PM *good side resurfaces* No! Come baaaack! *chases after her* —Dark Laith |
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mandeemoo22 |
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Monday, April 11, 2005 at 1:26 PM I know what to do! *Dangles a bag of Harvest Cheddar Sunchips* —mandeemoo22 |
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Dusty TheHick |
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Monday, April 11, 2005 at 5:41 PM Okay, but you're on probation, Chaos. The MOST IMPORTANT condition of your probation is that you MUST NOT share the story of when you try to pass that swallowed badge. —Dusty TheHick |
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PureChaos414 |
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Monday, April 11, 2005 at 8:38 PM *GASPS* AHHHHHH ::grabs the chips and runs:: Kevin_U said I should turn in my badge when I became part of the GP, so it's just as well that I'm on probation. —PureChaos414 |
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