Thursday, September 4, 2003 at 11:43 AM Oh, this was a fun scene to transcribe. One of the people on this forum made an mp3 of it a few weeks ago; I don't remember who you are, but thank you for making it. ~~ Adam: You ever climb into one of those coin-op laundry giant comforter-dryers?
Drew: No, can't say that I have. Is that something everyone should've done?
Adam: I've done it.
Drew: No doubt.
Adam: Yeah.
Drew: Were you like crammed in there by one of your buddies, or?
Adam: Uhh, no, I went voluntarily. And, uh....
Drew: They turned it on?
Adam: Uh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
Drew: You could've killed yourself doing that.
Adam: It's more uncomfortable than you would imagine when it gets started, yeah, because--
Drew: How long were you in there for?
Adam: Oh, just, you know, a few moments, not too long. I mean, yeah, you'd choke on your own vomit or something, eventually. I mean, you're spinning around, and you're not spinning around like sort of sitting and spinning. Your--
Drew: You're bouncing.
Adam: Your ass is going over your head.
Drew: Yeah.
Adam: And there's hot air blowing up your ass. And the door latches from the outside, like there's no way of getting it open once you're on the inside.
Drew: Oh, my god.
Adam: And it's immediately uncomfortable. Like the guy puts the money in, slams the door, you start going around -- you make about five revolutions and you're not feeling great. You're clomping around on your head, it's all metal in there, it's got these, like, fins that you're trying to hang onto, and there's hot air being blown up your ass.
Drew: Was this a dare; was there money involved; was it a bet?
Adam: No, no, no.
Drew: Just bored.
Adam: Just bored.
Drew: This is why kids pierce themselves. That's today's version of going into the dryer at the laundromat.
Adam: Yeah.
Drew: So the reality is, if you were a teenager today, you'd have S coming out of your lips, your eyebrows...
Adam: I'd have my hood pierced.
Drew: Your hood would be pierced, you'd have multiple ampallangs, yeah.
Adam: Hmm. Yeah. You know, it's funny, I was about three seconds into it before I thought to myself, "God, does this suck." And then I thought, "What the hell did you expect this was going to be like?"
(Drew laughs.)
Was it going to be like Space Mountain or something? You're in North Hollywood, you're inside this metal comforter-dryer,and you're upside-down, you got hot air blowing up your ass, and your buddy Ray is the gatekeeper. And he ain't opening that door.
Drew: And he's laughing like a hyena.
Adam: Oh, yeah. And you're just looking at him between your own legs as you spin over and over, and the guy's just standing there laughing. And the door's latched on the outside.
Drew: How long did it go for?
Adam: Oh, they let you go till, you know, just when you give the, "I'm serious!" call. Once you give that "I'm serious" call, that's the Geneva Convention of buddies F-ing with each other. "I'M SERIOOOUUUS!"
Drew: When you got out, did you puke or anything?
Adam: No.
Drew: You were fine.
Adam: Yeah, I was fine. I was a little dinged up. You know, it dings your head, your head's bashing on that thing and stuff.
Drew (disgusted): Oh, god.
Adam: Yeah, that's good times. We all did it.
Drew (incredulous chuckle): You *all* did it?
Adam: Yeah. It cost a quarter.
Drew: Were you number 1?
Adam: Umm . . . I went number 2 on myself, if that's what you're asking . . .
Drew: No, I mean, were you the first one to go?
Adam: No, I think Ray got in there first.
Drew (quietly): Oh, my god.
Adam: Well, listen, we weren't fourteen. We were twenty.
Drew: No!
Adam: This is what happens when you don't go to college, Drew.
Drew (shocked): Oh, my god.
Adam: You got time to kill.
Drew (laughing): Oh, my god.
Anderson: I was picturing like ten!
Adam: Oh, no, no, no. We were adults.
Drew: Oh, my god!
Adam: Yeah. Good times. —Lil Napoleon |
